What does it mean to be a truly integrated and awakened man, and how does he achieve this state?
This is a question that has been written about by many, men and women alike. Barry Long, a Tantric Master, put it this way,
To be a fully integrated male, a man has to assimilate in his body the divine female energies that woman can only release to him through right physical lovemaking. But the man has to be man enough. He has to be able to love her enough; that is, love her selflessly during the actual act of lovemaking. He has to be able to absorb and express sufficient love in his body to reach the highest part of her, and love enough to extract the divine energies from her deepest center. To be able to love in this way is the authority man has lost – his only true authority over woman.
David Deida speaks of this when he says it is a woman’s ultimate purpose to be radiant love and to break open her lover’s heart no matter what the resistance until he surrenders to her love and allows himself to be love.
In many ancient societies’ where the feminine principle was honored, there were priestesses of the temple whose primary function was to be a source of Divine Feminine energy, radiant love, for the men who came into the temple for healing of the heart and reconnection to their own feminine energy. These women were known as the" prostitute compassionate", Sacred Prostitutes or Holy Whores.
The Latin term for whore had its root in the Vedic, an early Sanskrit language, wherein the word puta is defined as pure and holy. The cave, the pit, the hole, and the bottomless black lake were metaphors for the Great Goddess, She is the Everything and The Nothing-Hole-y, Holy, Wholly. Holy Whore at work was, in fact, the manifestation of the Great Goddess.
These women were trained to serve the Goddess by becoming conduits and channels of her energy while making love. They knew how to use their sexual energy and how to be an expression of “divine love”, radiant love . They were taught the Arts of Love, and developed mastery over their sexual energy. They learned how to be a channel for their Shakti, (feminine creative life force), and how to share that energy with men through the act of lovemaking. In ancient Sumer and Babylon, temple priestess/prostitutes of the goddess received the god-bearing stranger. Their sexual union was, for both participants, communion with the divine. In many ancient cultures, in order for the land to prosper and for a king to have legitimacy in the eyes of the people, he had to celebrate the hieros gamos (sacred marriage) with a priestess who represented the goddess.
These women transmuted any sense of personal self and completely surrendered their identity to the Divine. They were nameless in this Holy Act of Love. Many of the men who went to war came back disconnected from their heart and soul, or needing healing from some trauma, so he went to the Temple before he went home to spend a night with a Temple Prostitute. And through this act the man was healed, he reconnected with his heart energy and was once again open to love. It was thought that it was only through a woman's body that this energy could be accessed. By spending an evening with a Sacred Whore he became whole once again “holy” made whole, and was then able to go out and rejoin society.
For it is the woman’s “job”, once she herself has awakened to the love that she is, to help her man come to a greater knowledge of God, which is love.
It can be said that I have been taught by the divine principle of woman, I have been led by her, I have been crucified by her and most certainly I have been loved by her. Barry Long
Today there are no sacred prostitutes or wholy whores,yet these teachings are available to us, to you and me through the practice of Tantra. Tantric teaching tells us that it is a woman’s primary responsibility to awaken the heart of her man and one of the way she can do this is through lovemaking.
A woman today can begin to learn these things by first accepting that she really need do nothing else but allow her own heart to open. Since it is the natural state of woman to be love, the only thing a woman has to do is to let go of any resistance she herself has to being love. What does this mean to “be” love? For me it means that I am allowing myself to feel love for the sake of love itself. If my natural state of Being is love, then I cannot not be love. I am that, and as a woman I have already been given the gift of being able to feel that love deeply and purely in my heart. When I am with the man I love I am able to pour that love into him, to use it to penetrate his heart whenever he shuts down. I am willing to break through any part of him that is not allowing himself to feel that love, which in reality is him too. A man just does not feel this as readily as a woman does.
Men are primarily the masculine principle of pure consciousness, and their gift is to learn how to be fully present in every way possible. My gift as a woman is to radiate love to everyone and especially to my partner, lover or beloved. It is in this way that a man allows himself to give himself fully to a woman and to feel her inside of him. Then he embraces his feminine energy and he is made more integrated and whole because of this.
As Barry Long stated, “He has to be able to love her enough; that is, love her selflessly during the actual act of lovemaking. He has to be able to absorb and express sufficient love in his body to reach the highest part of her, and love enough to extract the divine energies from her deepest center.”
When a man allows himself to do this he can then give himself the gift of Love, which as we all know can transform anything and anyone.