Do you ever find yourself as a parent, becoming enraged over something your child has done (or not done)? If your answer is no, then likely you have lying issues in addition to parenting issues. ALL parents lose their cool from time to time but if you find yourself losing your temper all/most of the time; you really need to address your behavior before you can expect to change the negative behavior of your child.
It's a sad but true fact of life that our children do indeed copy our behavior (both good and bad) so if you've taught your children to react with anger when they are frustrated; likely that is the behavior they will resort to when things go wrong in their lives. When your child engages in negative behavior and you lose your cool; the end result is likely you losing control of your emotions and saying things to your child that are not positive in nature. Also you will likely engage in modeling a behavior that you will later want to eradicate in your child.
It's hard to keep your emotions in check during the heat of the moment but the more you can remain in control; the quicker things will calm down and not escalate into a flown blown confrontation between you and your child. Try and focus more on your relationship with your child vs their behavior when things are going off the rails..it's hard to argue alone and if you fall prey to bickering back/forth with your child; it's going to be a LONG time before they go off to college and your household will resemble a war zone more than a loving home, the longer it continues.
As a parent, it's your responsibility to set the tone of your home in terms of peacefulness. If "Home Sweet Home" is sounding like a pipedream; consider making some changes to bring about a more peaceful environment for all family members and start within yourself. Don't expect miracles or overnight changes likely it took years to get to where things are today so be patient and learn to hold your tongue when you are upset. Day by day you will see changes and you will be giving your child (and future spouses/children) the gift of a person that can handle stress in an effective manner.
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