Traveling with young children is no vacation! A recent Sunday New York Times article, Are We There Yet?, compares air travel with children to an episode of Survivor. With new airline policies and heightened stress levels, parents face more than the usual challenges from kids in confined, pressurized spaces. They may find themselves in hostile, unsympathetic surroundings.
Hopefully, we can encourage anyone who has or knows a child to be as helpful as they can, especially this holiday season when the numbers of travelers will be increasing on roads and in the air. Today’s parents may be the new holiday warriors braving criticism and apathy just to reunite with loved ones. More than ever before, parents are asked to keep young children in their seats for longer and longer periods of time.
Learning to cooperate in challenging situations takes practice, for parents as well as children, as well as a little good luck on the mood and conditions of the day. Here are a few suggestions from The Entitlement-Free Child to prepare and engage your child for those long periods of contained activity:
- Practice, practice, practice. Seatbelts are not optional in cars, just as they aren’t optional in planes. Help your child transfer car skills to plane skills by noticing all the similarities between the two. If you truly expect resistance on the plane, play “airplane seat” at home by having your child practice sitting in his car seat while he watches a video, plays a sticker game, or colors pictures.
- Know your child. As with other acts of childhood resistance, it may not be about the seat at all. Resistance can be based on attention-getting, pushing emotional buttons in a public setting, or simply the stress of changes to the normal routine, including being tired, hungry, or cranky. Most people are uncomfortable sitting on planes. You need a little of your parental wisdom to fortify your child’s stamina in a trying situation.
- Plan ahead. Get your child involved before you leave home. Teach him to pack his own in-flight goody bag with games and snacks. Build anticipation for airplane-seat games that will distract him from his temporary confinement: cloud games based on the book It Looked Like Spilt Milk, sticker books, or mini photo albums. Be sure to pack carry-ons for extended delays: diapers, snacks, beverages, toys and extra clothes for children and for the parents who often wear the child’s “emergency”.
- Model effective problem solving with “what else” thinking. When all else fails, consider What else can you do? Surely, there’s something good in your purse that is usually off limits to your child. Adults play poker with dollar bills; children can count the pairs and triplets in the serial code. What else? Pull out the map in the back of the in-flight magazine. More? “What else” is a never-ending game that will drive you crazy long before your child exhausts the possibilities.
With practice and preparation and a great sense of humor, you just might make it to your holiday destination with your holiday spirit still intact
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