When you’re going through a rough breakup the last thing that comes to mind is that it’s a good thing. Many people hold a sour attitude towards relationships after being burned, and others handle it with their faces at the bottom of a tub of ice cream, watching re-runs of romantic comedies, and falling off the face of earth for weeks on end. No matter how you attempt to handle the breakup, it’s a good thing whether you see it or not.
When you’re in a relationship you sacrifice a lot for that person. You sacrifice your time, energy, and sometimes the very things you want or need. Once the relationship falls apart and there is no way to mend it, you may have essentially unchained yourself from limitations. Was she allergic to dogs, but you’ve always wanted one? Was he always demanding your time but you never had time for friends? Was the relationship draining you from catching up with family? Think of the things that you can now do, without guilt or lectures and do them.
Sometimes without a bad breakup we can’t see the world for what it is, or who we really are. When a breakup happens you may feel inclined to bash that person to pieces on whom they are, but with time you can see where you went wrong. You can see what you can take from this failed relationship and grow from it. Were you a bit too jealous at times? Did you need him to check in every single day? Did you not give her enough attention but had time for others? A breakup is the best way to figure out what makes you a great person in and out of a relationship. It’s also a blessing to be able to see what you can bring into a new relationship based off of what you just learned.
This goes hand in hand with self growth. You have the chance to improve yourself in all areas now that it’s over, and quite frankly you may have needed that relationship to push you. Have you been avoiding working out? Have you been slacking on your education? Have you been too much of a workaholic? Use the pain, frustration, and freedom from the breakup to harness the things that can improve yourself. Become that person who you thought you were during that relationship and the person you forever want to be moving forward; not for the ex but for yourself.
The bottom line is that a relationship ending isn’t really the end, but a new beginning for you. You’ll be able to have the chance to grow, understand who you really are, and figure out what you truly want. Take the time at the end of a breakup to look at what makes you happy, what you deserve, and what you can bring to a relationship rather than what you may have just lost.