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Hell Date: The Polygamous

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Can I just say, dating in L.A. sucks!

In case you were not aware, the dating scene in Los Angeles tends to get weirder and weirder by the second. The men out here are either: broke and looking for a handout, rich and overly entitled, want a woman to be their beard, or just plain bizarre.

I had been talking to Calvin for a few months, but it never really went anywhere. He would constantly make promises to take me somewhere, but when it was time to show up he would go Missing in Action. So of course, being the Rules girl that I am, I advised him that his behavior was not acceptable and to please not contact me anymore. That was in December. Well, yesterday, after my “Gay-boyfriend” dumped me, out of boredom and rejection, I hit Calvin up on Skype and for a moment I thought- maybe I should give this guy a second chance. I mean, he’s funny, interesting, and we can talk for hours. That’s when it happened. .. He asked why I was single, but before I could answer he told me that the reason he was “single” was because he was having a hard time finding a woman who was down with his lifestyle. So naturally, I inquired, “What lifestyle is that”. His answer: BDSM.

WTF?! But, hey, I’m opened minded so I wanted to know more. He then informs me that he is a “Master”, and feels that because he is doing well financially he should have TWO WOMEN! No, not a wife and a side chick; I’m talking “Sister Wives” – “Big Love” style- poly relationship. He then, spent the next two hours trying to recruit me into his “family”. I explained to him that for me, mate priority is critical and I’m not emotionally mature enough to share my man. Then, as I thought about it, I asked well maybe if I could have a boyfriend on the side, but he wasn’t having that! He insists that another man would be incapable of treating my heart with care, unlike himself who could provide for me financially, emotionally, and physically. And as my jaw hit the floor into hysterical laughter, it became clear to me. If I want to find a “normal” guy, I’m going to have to move out of L.A!

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