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Grumpy grandparents

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Why are grandparents grumpy?

My grandpa passed away 3 1/2 years ago. Instead of grandma becoming closer to the family, she is pulling away. Grandma was never a grouchy person; so what makes grandparents grumpy as they get older? The conclusion I've come up with is as they get older they are probably tired more often, exhausted from family drama, and feel more pain than normal due to achy bones and health complications.

The next question, how do we get along with our grandparents when they aren't always nice? Here are a few ideas to try and relate to your elders.

Step #1: try to keep in contact with them at least once a month. Let the grandparent do the talking while you sit back and listen. (might I add, keep the conversation short. The shorter the better.)

Step #2: Offer to occasionally help them out. (For example: clean their house, cook a meal, take the trash out, etc.) Respect their wishes whatever their answer is when you try to be helpful.

Step #3: Don't aggravate the grandparent. Don't ask them "how is living in the green tomb?" (the color is of the family member's house) Be nice as much as possible, but make sure everything is based around what the family member appreciates and enjoys.

Step #4: Try to think about things from their perspective. By putting yourself in their shoes, maybe you will understand that person a little better and learn how to communicate with them more effectively.

Nothing says communicating with our elders is easy. At times, it feels like they go out of their way to hurt our feelings and be mean just because they can. If they continually be mean, then it is for you to decide if you walk away from the relationship. If not, hang in there. Keep trying to communicate. Things will be better at some point.



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