This is another post in Blog Carnival series on One Word at a Time and this time the word is Grief.
Grief is one of those funny things as many people do not really know how to express grief. Grief is important and must be dealt with in an appropriate way or it can cripple you.
I used to think that if you knew the person was dying then it would be easier when they went but I do not think that is necessarily true. Loss is loss no matter when it happens. Yes when the person is dying you do have a chance to say goodbye and all of that rather then if the person gets run over by a bus for example. But it is not any easier to deal with.
Recently I presided at a funeral for a young man with a young family. Cancer took him way too young and his children will have to grow up with only memories of their father. They were great at the funeral by the way.
One of the things that has always impressed me about the Orthodox Funeral Service is the Final Goodbye. The casket is open in the church during the funeral, and prior to the final blessing all the assembly is invited to come forward and pay their final respects. Some simply walk by and nod others pause and pray and some some extreme emotion. Saying goodbye is an important part of the process and we need to say goodbye.
Emotion is something that we need to be able to express. After another funeral years ago, the widow told me that she does not cry that crying is wrong. Oh I have to beg to differ! Crying is an important emotion and we need to cry. I am not saying that we need to wail when we cry but we do need to express our emotions.
Grief does not only affect us with death we can grieve many things. Loss of a job, loss of a home, a pet, etc. We can even grieve when our favorite football teams plays like idiots! Okay I am better now.
Grief is a complex emotion that needs to be dealt with and you should not deal with it alone. Find a trusted friend or member of the clergy and share your grief.