It's almost graduation season, and chances are you have a friend who is completing schooling, and whatever it is, high school, an undergrad degree, graduate school, or an online medical assisting program, it's important to show people close to us that we're proud of them and their accomplishments. Mark the event, even if the graduate isn't going to participate in a commencement ceremony or have a party. Studying, reading, and writing are often very lonely activities, especially for adult students doing a program on their own. Acknowledging this tough accomplishment will mean a lot. Even if you felt neglected during that time, remind your friend that the sacrifices she made to her wallet, her friendships, and possibly her mental heath were all worth it.
In general, the best friendship gifts do one of two things: create a memory or provide a sentimental keepsake. For graduations, creating closure and helping your friend relearn how to relax are also valuble goals.
You'll notice that booze and flowers don't follow this criteria. Yes, a pretty bouquet and bottle of wine or her favorite vodka will be appreciated, but once they're gone, they're gone. Either skip the alcohol and flowers or include them as supplements to the rest of the gift. However, you might consider a wine or beer subscription, which would deliver a monthly selection to the graduate's home, serving as a reminder to kick back. If coffee is more your friend's style, look at the subscriptions offered by Alterra Coffee in Milwaukee. It's delicious and will be a welcome treat, especially if she's been getting her morning jolt from Nescafe.
But what about money, you ask? Most graduates will tell you that the gift they want most is money. Money really is the classic, stand-by gift for the graduate. But in these economic times, sometimes the amount of cash we can give is laughable, and besides, as appealing as a stack of bills can be, there's not a lot of sentimental value therein. Money is the ideal gift to receive from aunts and uncles we see once a year at holidays, but from a close friend, something personal is better. Having said that, if you are fabulously wealthy (and your friend is not), her graduation (along with wedding) serves as one of the few times when your friend will probably accept free money without an argument or feeling too awkward about it. Another option if you are well-off and generous is to treat your friend with a trip. Does he like to ski, or is he more of a beach person? Where has she always wanted to go, but has never been? What language did your friend study? Take him to a country that speaks it! Or take a drive up for a quiet weekend in Door County. Chicago has many world-class restaurants that most of us will never visit; consider making reservations for a once-in-a-lifetime dinner at Alinea, Moto, or Charlie Trotter's (all of which will cost about the same as a weekend out of town, tolls, gas, and meals included).
Other, more affordable options to create a memory:
1. Take him out on a fun, but not quite as deluxe, night on the town. Offer to pay for the babysitter, if needed.
2. Get Cubs or Sox tickets (she's your friend, you should know which).
3. Plan a day at Great America.
4. Treat him or her to a spa day.
5. Look here to see if his favorite bands are coming to Chicago; and while this should go without saying, get two tickets, go with him, and buy his drinks if you are able to do so.
6. Do not underestimate the power of the surprise party: they aren't just for turning the big three-oh.
The goal here is to create a memory and to mark the occasion by saying, "you worked hard, now you deserve to play hard."
Tangible options for a sentimental keepsake:
1. A book. You may be tempted to get Seuss's Oh, The Places You'll Go; don't do it. But consider a collectible copy of her favorite book or one by her favorite author. If it's signed by the author, even better.
2. A piece of art. This is tricky and depends a lot on how well you know his taste, but there is no better keepsake than artwork. Obviously, if your friend isn't settled or have a place of his own, this might not be the best gift.
3. Explore Etsy. There are oodles of handmade, unique gifts such as jewelry, quilts, and computer accessories on Etsy. They even have a category called "Geekery." Look for an Etsy store with a style that suits your friend. Keep in mind that with enough notice, many artists will custom-make items, such as this Illinois artist who will create a wall hanging or decorate the cover of a store-bought journal based on a theme and desired colors.
4. Jewelry makes a lovely keepsake gift, as long as it's classic. Avoid the cute (nothing with her name or hearts) and avoid the trendy; something like a Pandora bracelet will be dated almost immediately, but a simple chain and pendant or something that's already vintage, like a locket or cuff bracelet, will stand the test of time.
5. Check if your friend is one of the thoughtful few who has an Amazon wish list, but don't just grab anything. Make sure your selection suits you, too, and will serve to remind your friend of your friendship so it doesn't become just another DVD or book on the shelf.
Other notes:
Keep in mind not to treat the card as simply a formality; if a card is special enough, even the least sentimental person will hold onto it. Include a personal note. If it's not in you to hand make a card, take the time to find a good one at a card shop like Greer or Pulp & Ink; don't just grab one at Jewel as an afterthought.
Avoid gifts that are related to job searching or to your friend's desired profession. Graduation celebrations and gifts should focus on the accomplishment and not the stress and hard work to come. For a lucky few, completing this degree might mean a raise, but most people are probably still affected by the terrible economy. Your friend probably has had to justify her decisions to parents, siblings, maybe even a spouse. She might be stressed out about student loans. If he doesn't have a job, he's probably asked frequently if there's "anything new on the job front." (Parents love asking that one). A well-intentioned business card holder, a sexy new laptop bag, or a how-to book on resume writing and successful interviewing might add to the pressure he's already feeling.
Comments