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Golden Bowl 2014: Windy City v SoCal Derby

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On Sunday, June 15, at the Craneway Pavillion in Richmond, CA, the Bay Area Derby Girls hosted day two of The Golden Bowl, an invitational tournament where high ranking WFTDA teams compete for rankings in the months leading up to Divisionals.

The Windy City Rollers (#11) played SoCal Derby (#34) at 11:30 a.m. According to Flat Track Stats Windy City was given a 99% chance of winning, and slightly exceeded expectation. In fact, the game went exactly as predicted, give or take a single point.SoCal looked particularly impressive in their white jerseys with purple tentacles rising up from the seam at the waist. Their slogan was to release the Kraken. If the Kraken is prone to acts of huge violence, release it they did.

The first jam

The first jammers to the line were Killa Nois for Windy and Pippy Longstalker for SoCal. Longstalker, though jamming and blocking, won MVP Blocker for the tournament. Nois took lead and with Longstalker in hot pursuit, did a 180 spin to collect four points and call the jam. 4-0, Windy.

SoCal would remain scoreless until the third jam when Trouble Von D’Trak got lead against Windy’s The Jamburglar. On her second pass Trak called the jam off after collecting two points but not before The Jamburglar stole two points of her own. 14-6, Windy.

Jan Trainor took the line against Kung Pow Tina of SoCal who after a decent fight got lead jammer. Unfortunately, Tina didn’t know she was lead and proceeded to make a number of desperate and tragic mistakes. After being recycled halfway around the track by Windy defense and beat up pretty badly, Tina could have simply called off the jam. Instead, she removed the panty, surrendering her lead jammer position and passed the panty to her pivot Trish the Dish. Trish only had the panty for a few seconds before she cut the track and was sent to the penalty box, taking SoCal from in control of the jam to giving Windy a power jam. After all was said and done, Windy had solidified their lead against SoCal, which would last the remainder of the bout. 41-9, Windy.

This ill-fated panty pass would not be the last of the bout. There were at least three SoCal panty passes in the first half of the bout, none of them netting any advantage. In fact, panty passes, usually a rarity, were common place in the tournament and more of a nuisance than a tactical advantage.

With about 13:00 left in the half Ying O’Fire for Windy and Irie Strider for SoCal left the jammer line and headed into the pack. Fire was taken out by a huge hit from Trish the Dish who wass sent to the box for a high block. Once the jam was called there was an official review but the refs voted against expulsion. 119-23, Windy. By this point of the bout there was a huge sense of violence permeating game play. Skaters were in constant rotation through the penalty box, with Windy having blockers in the box two sitting and one standing.

With about 4:00 remaining in the half, The Jamburglar for Windy and Kung Pow Tina for SoCal took the jammer line. The Jamburglar cut the track and passed the penalty box requiring a second trip around before she could serve her 30 seconds. Meanwhile Tina passed the panty to Trish the Dish. While Dish was distracted with putting on the panty, Team Captain for Windy, Bork Bork Bork blasted her with a huge and legal hit to the outside. Dish remained on the ground and signaled to the ref that she was waiting for a call. Once she got back up, Bork Bork Bork hit her again. This time Bork hit her with her head between the chin and shoulder blade again putting Dish on the floor. Bork was assessed a high block and the jam was called because Dish was hurt. Dish returned to the bench before the half but without her skates on and with a huge ice pack strapped to her shoulder. She didn’t play the rest of the bout.

Score at the half: 231-72, Windy

The second half began with jammer Irie Strider of SoCal in the penalty box serving the remainder of her 30 seconds for a multi-player block before the half expired and The Jamburglar on the jammer line. The Jamburglar went on a 25-point scoring spree before calling off the jam. After this Windy would continue to make huge gains while keeping SoCal scoreless. 291-72, Windy.

Killa Nois of Windy took the jammer line against Buns of Fury. Nois was sent to the penalty box for blocking out of bounds and Fury got a much needed power jam. She was able to pick up a grand slam, even after being savagely attacked by Hoosier Mama.

Perhaps because of the snowballing point spread or perhaps because of something intangible the audience wasn’t privy too, the bout was soaked in rabid violence. Every hit was as hard and devastating as it could be, though most were legal. This was the kind of derby that brings the fans in, all female, full contact roller derby, making this bout the most exciting of the three to watch that day at the Golden Bowl. Point spreads are interesting, intellectually, but nothing tops sports fueled rage.

With only 7:39 left Windy broke the 400 mark as The Jamburglar scored a grand slam while Kung Pow Tina was trapped in the pack. 404-125, Windy. A few minutes later Ob Noxious of SoCal fouled out of the game for seven penalties. The last jam was The Jamburglar against Buns of Fury. Fury went immediately to the penalty box for a track cut while Jamburglar racked up the points. Fury was released and returned immediately for a second track cut. By then Jamburglar had scored 34 points. It was beyond the point when she committed a back block, because the game clock had expired.

Final Score 481-135, Windy

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