As an atheist, I find the human capacity to believe anything they want to as long as it feels intuitively "right," endlessly fascinating and I collect anecdotes about it from my encounters with the faith-filled. This one occurred last Summer. I like to think of it as an example of:HEAVENLY RELATIONS
I was waiting in the supermarket checkout line when I noticed that the cashier had a pin on her blouse that read "GOD'S GIRL." Since I'd never seen one like that before, I pointed to it and asked, "married to Him or just dating?"
Apparently the cashier didn't realize I was making a joke. She turned unblinking zombie eyes on me and said, "Yes, we're married. The Lord is my God. He is the King of the World; the only True King and I am his handmaiden." She went on and on in this vein, all the while passing items over the scanner, adding totals and bagging my groceries. As far as I could tell, she never missed a beat or paused for breath -and the only time she stopped preaching was when she told me my total and asked, "paper or plastic?"
It was an awe-inspiring performance. It's too bad churches don't honor double-coupons or I'd do all my shopping there!
Photo Credit:
1) The bride of Christ (eagleeyemedia.com)
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Comments
Great anecdote. I get creeped out by people who emphatically state that they have a "personal" relationship with Jesus. Maybe it's my already-damned-to-Hell-atheism, but it always has a disturbing sexual connotation to it.
Just because God loves you and sees you masturbate doesn't mean he's your mate.
I think the bit where Jesus is part of your marriage is the creepiest part of religion. This picture is creeping me out. Christians are have a threesome with a dead guy who can read your minds but doesn't want you to have sex unless it's to make babies.
You were lucky. The God's Girls I grew up around were nuns in black habits, and they were allowed to inflict assault and battery without provocation or warning.
Hugh,
Great story, thanks for sharing.
My favorite God-Girl story is the one found in the Christian gospels about a dead-beat dad who knocked up a nice Jewish girl, then abandoned both mother and child to fend for themselves.
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