Skip to main content
  1. AXS Entertainment
  2. Arts & Entertainment
  3. Arts & Exhibits

Funny one liners, quotes to make Dad laugh on Father's Day + card tutorial

See also

Intro: Looking for funny Father's Day quotes and sayings for your homemade cards or eCards or even to decorate some photos for your dad, step dad, grandpa or even your husband? Then you'll want to get out a pad and pen and jot some of these hilarious Dad's Day funnies down. They're great if you can't come up with one liners on your own to express how much you appreciate your pop this coming Father's Day.

Finding the Right Words: On Funny Father's Day Quotes and Sayings...

It seems the older I get, the more I love perusing through those Father's Day cards from a daughter. Ironically, it's especially true now that my dad is gone. I often find myself in the aisles of stores, letting out a major guffaw at the humorous jokes you can find in modern day Father's Day cards. Really, some of the best sentiments about the day are also the funniest.

Humor is so personal and very often, the cards that we send or make for our pops include inside jokes, bittersweet funnies and all manner of mirth. If you find that the easiest way for you to connect with your dad this Father's Day is through humor, you're not alone. In another Dad's Day article, I wrote about the one liners my dad used to put in our cards. It definitely started a tradition with me!

Below, you'll find plenty of funny Father's Day quotes and sayings plus some links where you'll have access to silly jokes and some poems for the occasion as well. If you follow the links, you'll also find places that you can find some free printable Father's Day cards.

Or if you watch the video tutorial at the top of the screen, you'll find instructions for a Father's Day to make. If you follow this column at all, you know what a weakness I have for handmade cards. They're one of my favorite art forms. Plus they're a great place to put any Dad's Day photos or pictures. These images along with your great one liners will make the perfect personalized card or gift for the dads in your life.

Hilarious Happy Father's Day Sentiments for Cards

The older I get, the smarter my father seems to get. Tim Russert

If the new American father feels bewildered and even defeated, let him take comfort from the fact that whatever he does in any fathering situation has a 50 percent chance of being right. Bill Cosby

I have always had the feeling I could do anything and my dad told me I could. I was in college before I found out he might be wrong. Ann Richards

When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. Mark Twain

When Charles first saw our child Mary, he said all the proper things for a new father. He looked upon the poor little red thing and blurted, "She's more beautiful than the Brooklyn Bridge. Helen HayesA lot of controversy over this possible invasion of Iraq. In fact, Nelson Mandela was so upset, he called Bush's dad. How embarrassing, when world leaders start calling your father. Jay Leno

When I was a kid, I said to my father one afternoon, 'Daddy, will you take me to the zoo?' He answered, 'If the zoo wants you, let them come and get you. Jerry Lewis

Having children is like living in a frat house - nobody sleeps, everything's broken, and there's a lot of throwing up. Ray Romano

The only Father's Day tradition in my family is the annual conversation he and I have where I say, 'Hey, Dad, what do you want for Father's Day this year?' and he says, 'Nothing.' Then I ask my mom what I should get him and she says, 'He likes sandalwood soap, dangly jewelry and Chanel No 5 perfume. Michael Showalter

Men should always change diapers. It's a very rewarding experience. It's mentally cleansing. It's like washing dishes, but imagine if the dishes were your kids, so you really love the dishes. Chris Martin

By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong. Charles Wadsworth

Father's Day Jokes and Poems

Jokes 4 Us: Dad's Day jokes

Aha Jokes for Fathers

Boys Life Father's Day Funnies

Free Father's Day Images and Pictures to Print for Cards

About.com: Printable Cards for Dad

Got Free Cards: Father's Day

Greetings Island: Father's Day

Advertisement

Today's top buzz...

  • Backstreet Boys
    The Backstreet Boys have canceled several upcoming Israel shows, citing safety concerns
    Music Buzz
  • NFL
    The NFL is considering adding a stadium to Los Angeles, but is it a good idea?
    Video
    NFL Buzz
  • Hulk Hogan
    Hulk Hogan and Steve Austin are on board for this year's WWE SummerSlam
    WWE News
  • Paul McCartney
    Get an exclusive look at Paul McCartney's soundcheck for a recent performance
    Camera
    20 Photos
  • Oscar contenders
    Oscar season is about to begin as fall festivals announce films
    Camera
    9 Photos
  • Sammy Hagar
    Sammy Hagar is taking fans on a raucous history of rock on the road
    Camera
    20 Photos

Related Videos:

  • James Baldwin Reading James Baldwin
    <iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/_Xy3ounRw9Q?VQ=HD720&amp;allowfullscreen=true&amp;autoplay=1"></iframe>
  • Celebrated African-American Author James Baldwin
    <div class="video-info" data-id="517633864" data-param-name="playList" data-provider="5min" data-url="http://pshared.5min.com/Scripts/PlayerSeed.js?sid=1304&width=480&height=401&playList=517633864&autoStart=true"></div>
  • Spike: Into the Light
    <div class="video-info" data-id="517685959" data-param-name="playList" data-provider="5min" data-url="http://pshared.5min.com/Scripts/PlayerSeed.js?sid=1304&width=480&height=401&playList=517685959&autoStart=true"></div>