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Funny Christmas songs: Twelve Days of Christmas parody

 Taking a cue from this Top Five Funny Christmas Songs article, written by a Pennsylvania native, I decided a Twelve Days of Christmas parody would be in order. 

With caroling season right around the corner, don’t you want to visit the homes in your PA neighborhood with some new and unique songs to make body modification lovers giggle? 
 
Verse 1: On the first day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: a single, dangly earring
 
Verse 2: On the second day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
For more adult, funny Christmas songs, two nipple rings can replace two navel rings. 
 
Verse 3: On the third day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
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Verse 4: One the fourth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
Verse 5: On the fifth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
For more adult, funny Christmas songs replace gold barbells with hood piercings
 
Verse 6: On the sixth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
Verse 7: On the seventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earrings 
 
Verse 8: On the eighth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: eight dead sea salt soaks, seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
For more adult, funny Christmas songs replace dead sea salt soaks with frenum piercings.
 
Verse 9: On the ninth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: nine men suspended, eight dead sea salt soaks, seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
Verse 10: On the tenth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: ten corset piercings, nine men suspended, eight dead sea salt soaks, seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four barbell rings, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
Verse 11: On the eleventh day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: eleven brand new brow studs, ten corset piercings, nine men suspended, eight dead sea salt soaks, seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring. 
 
Verse 12: On the twelfth day of Christmas, my true love gave to me: twelve piercing artists, eleven brand new brow studs, ten corset piercings, nine men suspended, eight dead sea salt soaks, seven piercing needles, six shiny tongue rings, five gold barbells, four CBRs, three lippy loops, two navel rings and a single, dangly earring.

, Pittsburgh Body Piercing Examiner

Tara Swadley has been receiving body piercings for six years and exotic piercings for four years. Tara is proud of her knowledge of modification and her ability to work with piercing professionals to heal piercings that are normally called "difficult or impossible to heal" or even "a temporary...

Comments

  • Mitchell E. 1 year ago

    Mines Funnier and here it is.

    On the first day of Christmas some old man came to me, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the second day of Christmas some old man came to me, two old recliners and an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the third day of Christmas some old man came to me, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the forth day of Christmas some old man came to me, four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the fifth day of Christmas some old man came to me, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the sixth day of Christmas some old man came to me, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the seventh day of Christmas some old man came to me, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the eighth day of Christmas some old man came to me, eight coffee cups, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the ninth day of Christmas some old man came to me, nine wooden walkers, eight coffee cups, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the tenth day of Christmas some old man came to me, ten useless knickknacks, nine wooden walkers, eight coffee cups, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the eleventh day of Christmas some old man came to me, eleven thingermegigers, ten useless knickknacks, nine wooden walkers, eight coffee cups, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

    On the twelfth day of Christmas some old man came to me, twelve whathumacallits, eleven thingermegigers, ten useless knickknacks, nine wooden walkers, eight coffee cups, seven senior citizens, six two dollar bills, five black and white TV’s, (five black and white TV’s), four record players, three poker chips, two old recliners and, an old cookie from the retirement home.

  • Tara Swadley 1 year ago

    Mitchell, it's not a contest for what is funnier, especially since that would be subjected to who is reading it, and this is not supposed to be for everyone - it's why I'm the body piercing examiner, not the generic funny songs examiner.

    As for your version, while it has potential, the syllable counts are so far off the song is unsingable to the original beat of Twelve Days of Christmas. I worked for many hours to ensure mine lined up properly and could actually be sung by those who liked it.

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