There have been plenty of lengthy discussions on the benefits of forgiveness but what about forgetting? This little word has a bad wrap; especially when it is next to the word forgive. When the two words are together, numerous questions follow: How do I forget? Am I supposed to forget? Am I letting the person off the hook if I forget? If we forget then what's the sense in going through it?
Adopting a new perspective about forgive and forget is a terrific place to start. Here are few ways to get started:
1.Listen to what others have to say on the subject. For example, Jack Kornfield, “The past is over: Forgiveness means giving up all hope of a better past.” Ultimately we decide what to remember about certain situations and the inability to forgive does the most damage to the person who harbors the ill feelings.
2. Forgive yourself. Recognize the possibility you may be angry at yourself for various reasons. Forgiving oneself is a positive step towards forgiving others that eventually can lead to forgetting.
3. Visualize. Picture yourself in your own garden pulling your hope for a better past out of the ground and re-planting it in the present. It may just allow your future to grow.