Despite a bright sunny day outside, the mood at Dave’s Barbershop on San Fernando Road seemed subdued. The atmosphere was as low as a bottom of Mississippi River right after The Great Mississippi Flood. Downtown Ronnie Brown was crying the blues.
If you can’t do the time
Don’t do the crime, don’t do it. Don’t do it
If you think you are the best
Don’t ask no one to take the test, don’t do it. Don’t do it.
If you think you are a bad ass
Don’t be beating on baby mama’s ass, don’t do it. Don’t do it.
“I hope you are not going to defend your boy, Floyd this time,” exclaimed Dave the Barber pointing towards Ronnie Brown:” He wants to clean up the sport. He needs to clean up his own act. Where I come from you don’t put your hand on a woman no matter what! When I was young my wife threw dishes at me every time she saw me cut a woman’s hair.”
“That’s why it’s men’s barbershop only,” laughed out loud Ronnie Brown.
“Yes, but I would never even dream about retaliating,” continued Dave the Barber:” The aura of the woman is sacred. Especially considering that was his baby’s mama. Ninety days in the slammer is not enough. He is to report on January sixth. I hope Big Bubba extends a personal welcome to Pretty Boy Floyd at the jailhouse and makes that wife beater his bitch.”
“That ain’t gonna happen,” cried out Ronnie Brown:” They are not going to put Floyd in general population. Even though he really deserves it this time that would be cruel and unusual punishment... If you can’t do the time
don’t do the crime, don’t do it. Don’t do it! This boy thinks he is outside the law, but he went too far. He has priors on hitting women. He should get five years of hard labor on the chain gang. That would straighten his ass out.”
“You Can Take the Man Out Of the Ghetto, but You Can’t Take the Ghetto Out Of the Man,” said Al the Barber:” That boy is Ghetto, no matter how many checks he cashed and how much money he has in the bank, he is still Ghetto. I am just sick of it. Just like Tyson, his head gets so big; he thinks he can do whatever he wants. The only man I ever met above the law was your uncle Vanya, but he was a made man from Siberia. Here is an idea. Send Pretty Boy Floyd to Solovki for rehabilitation. Let him watch his own piss freeze in the air. That along with a nutritional diet of water and bread as hard as a rock, I bet that boy come back in real good fighting shape.”“This might be a historic moment here,” exclaimed Big Steve: “For the first time ever we seem to be in complete agreement about the subject matter. Floyd makes me nauseous. Why doesn’t he pick on some body his own size? Here is a thought. Honorable judge Melissa Saragossa sentenced Mayweather to 90 days in jail with community service. Floyd can work in the hospital or he can clean up a freeway or the judge could make him fight Manny Pacquiao. Wouldn’t that be a real service for the community?”
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