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FBI acknowledges pot smokers make better programmers

FBI director James Comey testifies before the Senate Judiciary Committee.
FBI director James Comey testifies before the Senate Judiciary Committee.
Photo by Mark Wilson/Getty Images

FBI Director James Comey admitted to a truth that most IT professionals already knew on Tuesday. In an interview with the Wall Street Journal he discussed the Bureau's problems with attracting a force capable of combating the growing threat of cyber-crime in today's world. The problem seems to lie with prohibition.

"I have to hire a great work force to compete with those cyber criminals and some of those kids want to smoke weed on the way to the interview," Comey said.

Since making these comments, Comey has been forced to backtrack from his temporary use of logic and common sense. The Senate Judiciary Committee confronted him about his statements Wednesday and forced the ignorance back into the discussion. The FBI won't be hiring any decent programmers anytime soon.

To explain his statements to the committee, Comey claimed he was "trying to be both serious and funny" which means he was telling the truth, but if you don't agree, he was totally just kidding. In the end, he gave the Senate Judiciary Committee the assurances they needed to continue to live in their fantasy world.

"At the same time, when young people's attitudes about marijuana and our states' attitudes about marijuana are leading more and more of them to trying it, I am absolutely dead-set against using marijuana, I don't want young people to use marijuana, it's against the law," Comey said. "We have a three-year ban on marijuana. I did not say that I am going to change that ban, I said I have to grapple with the change in my workforce."