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Falling for your friend when they’re already taken

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Have you noticed yourself trying to talk to your friend every chance you get? Do you flirt a little with him/her to see how they will react? This is one of the most difficult situations because you want to be with someone who is unavailable.

You may try to act normal and move forward with your life by getting in a relationship yourself. While you are in this relationship you might try to distance yourself from your friend. But you will notice that a relationship will never work out while you are crushing on your friend.

There are a couple ways you can approach your crush dilemma. The first way is to try to let it fade. This is an ideal option for someone who is good friends with both people in the relationship. But the thing is in order to make your feelings subside; you may need to cut ties with the one you are crushing, at least for a while. Be warned though that with this option, your feelings may never go away for your friend.

Another way to solve this is to tell them how you feel. Yes they are in a relationship, but are they really happy? Is he/she really happy? It is wrong to break-up a couple just because of your own feelings towards one of them, but what if the couple is already doomed?

Have they had problems in the past? If you talk with him/her, at first they may put on a front as if everything is fine but they should open up to you eventually. Also, take the chance to observe them when all of you are hanging out. Do they even seem like they’re in love anymore? Does she tend to talk to you more or joke with you more? While they are still together you should not encourage cheating because if they would cheat on the one they’re with for you, what’s to say they wouldn’t cheat on you with someone else?

If you do, however, tell them how you feel you may be giving them enough courage to decide to leave their current relationship, especially if she has the same feelings towards you. Sometimes people get stuck in a toxic relationship and know they should leave; but they just don’t know how to. The circumstances may be more complicated than just leaving the one they’re with, whether it is kids, marriage, family issues, or abuse. It is easy for someone in that type of situation to think they could never find someone else who could love them.

If they see that they are wanted then they may set things in motion to leave. Before making any rash decisions, try to observe how he/she acts in public. This includes the outside public and online social media. There are signs when a relationship is floundering that they may not know they are sending off.

What kind of posts are they sharing? Many people who want to leave a relationship will post a lot of inspirational things because they are trying to give themselves motivation to take the next step. You can also check out the type of music they are posting.

If you want to know if they like you, look closely to the conversations you two have. Does he/she throw in little flirty comments that are borderline joking around but could be taken as flirting? Does he/she always make an effort to talk with you or make plans with you? If he/she goes out of their way to see you or talk with you then chances are they do like you. But before assuming anything, try to find the signs as said above to see if they are actually happy with their current relationship.

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