Think about what it feels like when someone listens to you. I mean really listens. They do not interrupt. They do not look like they are planning where to go to dinner or what they have to say to someone once you finally shut up. They are there with you.
What a great feeling. Often you end up telling them more than you expected. You end up finding the solution to the problem that has been gnawing at you just as they are about to say something.
That is the magic of a mentor who knows how to listen.
Mentors worth their weight have learned to overcome their own life problems and they know what it is like to face an obstacle that seems impossible to scale. Most importantly, while they often have fabulous advice, they wait and in the waiting help you find your own voice. Extraordinary bosses often grew up as rescuers and became exhausted because they were solving everyone else’s problems and by the time they were looking at their own issues they were just too flat out tired to make good choices.
Now, using that rescuer energy to become a mentor they have learned to offer just the right amount of advice at the right time. Not too much and not too little. They have learned to wait and let you discover the diamond in the haystack. And when you are ready they are able to let go and let you make your own decisions without them. They celebrate your growth rather than feel abandoned.
Life is good for both of you.