Evolution has designed humans to crave interaction. Whether we be introverts or extroverts, children and adults alike thrive in supportive environments with others who truly understand us. For gifted youth, finding others with whom you can not only interact but bond at a deeper level can present a challenge.
Social difficulties and isolation may occur among gifted children because giftedness is about more than academic needs. Gifted children develop unevenly with extreme strengths paired with areas in which their development is much more typical. They tend toward perfectionism, extreme sensitivities, and great concern with social justice. These characteristics may cause a gifted child to be isolated socially.
The Davidson Institute for Talent Development, an organization dedicated to the needs of exceptionally gifted youth, features an article on their website which enumerates the social issues faced by gifted youth:
...children with unusually high levels of ability sometimes have a more difficult time finding compatible peers... problems of communication, starting in the preschool years, may be one root cause of the highly gifted child's involuntary isolation. A 3-year-old who expresses abstract ideas using the vocabulary of the average 6-year-old may not be understood by same-age peers...
With their advanced conceptions of group organization, highly gifted children may develop an adult-like manner with others, and be accused of bossiness. When efforts to be accepted fail, a highly able child may withdraw from social interaction...
The social alienation of extraordinarily gifted children is exacerbated by the insistence of educators and parents that they spend most of their time in the company of chronological peers. The assumption that children of the same age constitute a true peer group only holds true for children of average development...
Unless [special] efforts are made, highly gifted children run the risk of being labeled different and strange by their age mates, and may internalize this designation and become eccentric social isolates.
Of course, not all gifted children appear strange to their schoolmates. However, even those gifted children who appear on the surface to fit in well with others may be lonely in a crowd: a child with a lot of acquaintances but no soul mate.
Catherine Zakoian, a psychologist who works with the gifted, will be facilitating a workshop for parents of gifted children this Thursday, February 2, 2012 at Monarch High School in Louisville, Colorado. Gifted Children and Friendships will focus on strategies for helping your gifted child create and maintain meaningful friendships.
More information on this presentation and other upcoming events for parents of gifted children can be found on the Boulder Valley Gifted and Talented website.
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