Charcoal Drawing by Linda Mastrangelo
One of the extraordinary discoveries I’ve had with working on dreams as practice was how much wisdom is stored in the body. By drawing, speaking, feeling into my emotions and parts of the body I am able to inquire what energies and even myths that are working there. For example, over the last year I have had a deep sense of urgency that I must heal the wounds of my people: That my ancestral line, particularly the women, were in need of honoring as well as healing. This early song (mentioned in Part I) seemed to encapsulate this longing and I was able to follow this thread in Karen Jaenke’s Dreams and the Body class at John F. Kennedy University by working on a throat dream I had involving clay. I have been especially aware of my throat and the blockage I have been feeling there for years. It is hard to swallow and I am in a constant state of discomfort from wanting to swallow or dislodge whatever is in my throat. It isn’t surprising that I have many dreams involving the throat and one very recently involving two balls of clay falling from my mouth. By bringing this bodily sensation to my awareness I have been able to work with it better.
I decided to work with actual clay and could sense a deep somatic sadness embedded in my throat as I reenacted the dream. I also found myself making bread! It was a rhythmic almost hypnotic action like I had been doing this all my life. While I was working the ‘dough” I had a sharp image of another dream I had months prior that my family owned a famous bakery. I could actually see the large brick oven and the long wooden table that had flour and dough laid out on top of it. This dream felt like it took place hundreds of years ago. I could see my grandmother there and what struck me was that I knew there was a deep dark family secret. I followed the thread even further and was reminded of other dreams that shared this theme. One I had in 2003 of being an exiled monk in the 1500’s where I was forced to leave my community for something I did though I do not know what. Luckily in this dream, I do find my people I call ‘the Dreamers’ an enlightened group that works with symbols, dreams, sacred geometry and alchemy.
This strikes a strong chord in me concerning Eugene T. Gendlin’s book Let Your Body Interpret Your Dreams. In his work, Gendlin discusses the pattern in dreams and how this can gauge progress. For example, by dream mapping you can first locate a pattern and then find something new in the dream that wasn’t there before. Gendlin also notes that the dreamer is the last person to admit that there is progress going on and often reverts to the negative. His reminds me of the ‘Kegan’s Spiral’ when we revisit old wounds we often think that there has been no changes taking place when in fact there has been a shift. This is why Gendlin says it is so important to be gentle with ourselves
There is clearly a thread working here: A cosmic thread that weaves through my personal history and that of the collective and all stamped, like a thumbprint, on my body. I only need to explore the shadow regions of who I am to uncover what has been misused, broken are discarded like so many shards of ancient pottery underneath a vast desert landscape. These artifacts were considered treasures once and were made carefully and lovingly by my ancestors. If we piece them together we can find a culture, a practice, a community. As I dig I can feel myself getting closer to not only who they were but who I am and my role in the cosmic thread.
For more info: Please read: Dreams and the Body: Ways of Seeking Ancestral Knowledge - Part I
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