As the mayoral race gets started in earnest, it’s a good time to interview noted local expert and international pinhead, Dr. Einstein Teapartay.
So, Dr. Teapartay, thank you for. . .
Vote against Suttle!
Uh. Do you mean vote for Stothert?
I don’t know. I’m sure Jean Stothert woud agree that the most important thing is to oppose Suttle.
Mayor Suttle has done a lot of good.
No. By definition, if Suttle is for it, it’s bad.
He kept parks open and streets repaired through a terrible financial; crisis.
If Suttle likes them, then parks and repaired streets are bad.
He restored the city’s triple A bond rating.
A Stothert administration will put a stop to that.
His leadership got us through the flood of 2011.
We have discussed this before. If Suttle is against flooded cities, then they must be a good thing, and I’m sure Mayor Stothert will cause a flood first chance she gets. In fact, if you look at the “Vision”, part of her website, all her bullet points are nothing but jabs at Mayor Suttle. That’s looking ahead. That’s planning for a future of bright, promising negativity.
How about protecting the rights of all Omahans equally?
Mayor Stothert will restore us to our pre-Suttle level of unprotected minorities.
Why do you think all this would happen if Ms. Stothert is elected?
If you want the backing of the Tea Party, you have to imagine America as innocent and mean as it was in the Fifties.
But the Tea Party has backed horrible candidates.
Name one!
Christine O’Donnell, the one who had to point out she is not a witch.
Was she a witch?
Of course not.
There you have it.
Or Sharron Angle, who implied that if they can’t win elections, Republican voters should just shoot their opponents.
Jean Stothert will not do anything to take guns away from anybody – if that’s what you’re getting at.
Then there was Todd Akin, and that woman in Alaska who thought being able to see something made you an expert on it . . .
You are not going to get anywhere with this negative campaigning! We who support Jean Stothert are going to run a positive campaign of being negative towards anything Jim Suttle supports. This election is all about getting government out of governing.
What? Why?
Because it costs money to govern, and anything that costs money is bad.
How would we get services then? Would Jean Stothert privatize?
She hasn’t said she would. But what is wrong with making people pay for things they want?
That’s what they do now, when they pay taxes.
But taxes go to benefit everybody. Paying a fee to a private company only helps that company.
There are privatization horror stories.
And again - name one!
Firefighters let a house burn down because there wasn’t any profit in putting it out.
The only “horror story” is that there was no profit.
School kids being made to give their lunch back because of their poverty.
Those kids would not have been allowed to eat at, say, Wheatfields. And how exactly are schools any different than a restaurant chain?
So, under a Stothert administration, the city would be run for the profit of private businesses instead of the welfare of the citizens?
What would Mayor Suttle want?
Welfare of the citizens.
Then that must be a bad thing.
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