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Don't ask, just kiss

A good date ends in a successful kiss attempt.
A good date ends in a successful kiss attempt.
Photo by Uriel Sinai/Getty Images

A word of advice, men, when you are on a date with an amazing woman--it’s date number one, two or maybe three—and things are going splendidly, the chemistry is thick in the air, she is making it quite obvious that she is enjoying herself, the evening is winding down and you’ve arrived at that oh-so-perfect moment when all you need to do is make eye contact, hold it for a hot couple of seconds, slowly lean in to her and…for the love of all that’s holy DO NOT ask if you can kiss her!

Nothing kills the moment for a woman, that “first kiss” moment all women replay over and over again in their heads during boring classroom lectures, board meetings or spinning classes, like a man asking permission if he can kiss her.

Half the fun of being kissed for the first time is in the timing, the suspense leading up to the kiss and the excitement of wondering if this could possibly be the last first kiss of her life. And of course, the other half is in finding out if he is a good kisser!

It’s no surprise that this piece of information may confuse you, guys. Women still love to be properly courted, so please don’t stop pulling out chairs and opening car doors. Respectful gentlemen are still in high demand, in today’s society more than ever. Asking for her father’s permission to propose to her, admirable. Asking for her hand in marriage, romantic.

Asking if you can kiss her instead of just owning the moment and sweeping her off of her feet, slightly disappointing and anticlimactic.

Is it possible that you could be rejected mid-surprise-kiss, yes. But more likely, if you ask her, it gives her a chance to think about it and she may be more inclined to over-analyze the moment or the meaning of the kiss (because that’s what women do) and say no.

So, men, be brave. Spare yourself the awkwardness of asking, and spare the women in your future the opportunity to be less than enthralled by your kissing prowess.