You know that story about the guy who realizes he’s done the love of his life wrong and he swallows his pride and drives hundreds of miles to win her back? I do. It’s usually called a Nicholas Sparks movie. But this time, it’s real. A friend of mine recently realized that he messed up. He broke up with a great girl citing the usual complications that surround a long distance relationship. Mind you, he did this twice. The first time, she came to him- to work it out, to see if there was anything left to salvage, to see if they had a chance. The details are fuzzy but either way she went home early and they were not speaking.
He called and texted, and asked me if he should continue calling and texting, if it was selfish of him to keep trying to contact her. I told him it was, that if he really didn’t want to be with her, if it was too hard to be with her then he can’t keep texting her saying he’s sorry that he can’t be with her.
He did it anyway. He stared at his phone, deleting and rewriting “the final” text, the text that says it all. Sound familiar? Either way, she finally responded, after days of silence (good for her) and they got to talking. She was still unsure, and no doubt scared of opening this book for a third time. He asked if he could drive to see her, and she said it wasn’t a good idea. He decided that he was driving to be with her on NYE anyway. I swear I’m not making this up. He hopped in the car and set off to win her back.
He stayed with her, met her sisters and family, who were clearly not his biggest fans, he braved it all for another chance and promised they would never spend another holiday apart.
I’m not here to say that every man has to make a grand gesture or that every girl should expect one. I’m here to say that for every person who has been told that they are worth fighting for, that they wouldn’t be given up on, has anyone ever done this for you? I’ve been told that I was worth the world, fleeting words when you compare it to this story. I know no two relationships are the same and that every couple has strong and weak points. And it’s not that every woman wants this kind of fairytale. But, when it comes down to it, every woman wants to feel deserved of this kind of affection.
I know a lot of guys who are not children. Who are able to communicate feelings and the difference between their wants and their needs. I know a lot of women who are not clingy and have their own lives and goals. They weren’t always this way, reaching maturity obviously takes time and your great guy was at some point a complete tool, and you would have loved it because you were, at some point, a complete drama queen.
The couple from this story is currently still dating, fighting the distance and separation. Who knows if it will work out, but at least they’re trying and doing what they can. Which is more than most of us can say about our relationships when both people are in the same zip code. Don’t take advantage of having the person you are sharing your life with being close by and you might not have to drive hundreds of miles to say you’re sorry.