This post was on Facebook today, it starts out: “God hates divorce. He hates it because it destroys the children whom he loves. The result is a battered and bruised people.” and then it links to a book called Dark country of divorce by Max Lucado.
Really? We can probably all agree, there is way too much divorce in this country today, up to and including within the confines of Christian families. But is it fair to say that GOD hates divorce, divorce destroys the children he loves, divorce results in battered and bruised people.
First, in defense of the beginning statement. Yes divorce today is way too easy, most divorces today can and should be avoided. These divorces happen for many reasons. Someone failed to think of their spouses feelings too often, someone made too many decisions too many times without considering the spouses input in the matter, they just grew apart or got tired of each other, The grass looked greener on the other side of the fence, and on, and on, and on. In these kinds of divorce those involved should put more effort into working things out, for the kids sake if there are kids, for the families sake on both sides, and for each others sake, and most of all for the sake of the promises that were made when they spoke their vows. True, this effort will not save all these marriages, but it will save 80% – 90% of them. A little heartfelt effort can go a long, long way.
Now back to the questions at hand. 1. Does GOD hate divorce, 2. Does divorce destroy the children GOD loves, 3. Does divorce result in battered and bruised people?
1. Does GOD hate divorce? Of course GOD hates divorce, everybody hates divorce, including those getting divorced. Divorce is an unpleasant affair all the way around. GOD does hate divorce just as much as anyone hates an unpleasant situation, but do you really believe or even expect GOD to tell a woman who is being (raped, battered, threatened with death) to stay in her marriage and work it out because he hates divorce, do you really believe or expect that GOD would tell the woman (who has discovered that her husband coming home drunk every night, has been for the past years molesting their little children), to stay in her marriage and work it out because he hates divorce? of course you don’t. you would be the first one telling her to take the children and get out, do you really expect GOD to do any different than you would.
2. Does divorce destroy the children that GOD loves? This is a tough one, but not at all unsolvable. Yes; (in the case of those divorces that can and should be worked out) divorce does indeed destroy children’s lives, It is mainly for this reason that those divorces should be worked out, or at least an attempt made to work them out, because children having to daily choose between two people whom they love equally can and is a very destructive thing indeed. but as in question one’s answer, where you have children being molested, do you expect GOD to condemn the non molesting parent for seeking a divorce for the sake and safety of these little innocent ones? What of the marriage where the children are being physically beaten, verbally abused, or mentally abused. Do you really think that divorce will destroy those children, or do you, like GOD understand that divorce in this instance is saving the lives of those children, making their lives so much better.
3. Does divorce result in battered and bruised people? Ok I will give you this one for a moment. You have an abusive husband who does not wish to lose control of and power over his wife whom he views as his property, she try’s to get a divorce, he beats her up and threatens to kill her if she refuses to drop the divorce proceedings. now you have divorce resulting in battery, and bruises, and even threat of death. but do you believe or expect that GOD would tell this woman to suck it up and deal with it, do you think GOD would tell this woman to work it out. Concerning the hundreds of thousands of women who daily walk away from this kind of savagery and get divorced, do you really believe divorce is causing them to be battered and bruised, or do you understand as GOD does that divorce is putting an end to the battering and bruises of these mistreated and misused women.
God does indeed hate divorce, why wouldn’t he. He hates it, not because it destroys the children whom he loves, but because it is the direct result of our failure to take our time in choosing a mate for the proper reasons, he hates it because it is a direct result of using sexual attraction instead of love as the deciding factor in our marrying. Divorce does not result in a battered and bruised people, divorce results in the ending of people being battered, bruised, abused, and molested.
Yes, GOD does hate divorce, but he does not condemn it, religion does.