I learned from an early age there were certain rules I needed to follow, boundaries I needed to stay within, in order to keep me safe and healthy. My mum had a reason for not letting me stay up all night, and my dad had a reason for insisting that I wear a helmet whenever I was anywhere near wheels. They knew I could avoid being overtired and sustain brain injury if I was forced to take the necessary steps to do so.
As I entered adolescence, I found myself at the helm of my own ship, charting the unknown and sometimes choppy waters of chance, circumstance, and coincidence. I gained a sense of responsibility for my successes as well as my mistakes, and that responsibility only increased as I entered adulthood. Choices continued to constantly knock at my front door, demanding my consideration and action on steps to take regarding education, career, money, love, family, and friends. Some of these guests are easier to receive and decide upon a course of action with. Others I need more time to think about—days, weeks, sometimes even months.
Often I might seek expert advice from a third party on a particular issue. This is where so many late-night phone calls, texts, and coffees come into play. These outlets provide me, and I venture to guess countless others from the age of fifteen onwards, with the opportunity to gain additional perspective on matters I truly feel conflicted over. I will not always take the advice I am given, since in the end, I always make the choice I feel is best for me. But I do appreciate others taking the time to consider my conundrums and offer me their two cents when I am on teetering on the threshold of a costly decision.
I hail from a somewhat indecisive family. It is not unusual for some of us to arrive at a restaurant and keep the poor hostess waiting while we try to decide whether we want to sit in a booth or at a table. I always attributed this indecision to a genuine concern that of us worrying we are forcing others to do something they don’t want to do. Fortunately, we’ve all shown improvement in making decisions together over the years. If one of us really wants to sit at a booth, we’ll make it known. This is progress.
Perhaps the speed in which we make our decisions is not the real problem here. I say “some” because there are those emergency situations in which a decision must be made immediately for the sake of safety and survival. What is important is that we eventually make one. Remaining in a perpetual state of indecision poses potential danger to me, because it makes me feel like I’m not moving forward, one way or the other. And what good can come from that? It is through trial and error and lessons learned that I experience a great deal of my personal growth. And while I may be physically there already at five feet and nine inches tall, I still feel as though I have more spiritual and emotional growth to experience in my lifetime. So, it’s on with the next!