A man’s hands can send shivers down our spine even before he touches us. We adore those sinewy, manly paws of yours, the veins popping out to let us know yours are strong enough to hold us, caress us, make us want some more.
I was a teen the first time I noticed the difference between my smaller mitt and the boy sitting next to me. Both of us were on the cusp of adulthood, and though I don’t remember his name or face, I close my eyes and recall the size and shape of his hands next to mine.
We weren’t even touching. To this day, that young guy has no idea I was admiring him from afar.
Since then, my not so secret love affair with a man’s hands continues partially because I’ve learned that your intimate prowess depends on them. Strong and veiny, muscular and lean, thick and capable…skin that is cool to the touch. Manicured nails clean and clipped. Yes, women are detail oriented and we care about your hands because at some point you will place them on our body. We’re talking good touch vs. bad.
I wish more men knew this. I think more women wish men knew this too and just don’t know how to break the news. Which is why I’m going out on a limb and sharing these four tips including #4, the most important one of all.
Tip 1: Use a lighter touch.
Your touch needs and hers probably differ. She worries about hurting your feelings so she won’t say slow down or ease up but she’s cried on my shoulder about it. The barest of fingertips on the barest of skin may be all it takes to awaken her hunger for more. When you think you are touching her gently and oh so softly here, and there and in between, take it even slower. A lot less is a lot more.
Tip 2: Touch her more often.
Women often feel like a FisherPrice toy with knobs and buttons ready to push. Except we aren’t made of plastic and turn on with the flip of a switch. What your beloved needs, especially if she’s busy balancing family, work and motherhood is one-way touch without an agenda.
Your darling mate is skin hungry for touch that doesn’t lead to sex. Play with her hair, rub her feet, caress the inside of her arm or her lower back. Give her a hug. Ask her how and where she’d like to be stroked and then just do it. Her nerves will thank you for the nourishment of oxytocin that comes from being touched, affectionately and generously from you, her partner, beloved and mate.
Tip 3: Get MANicures.
Real men get manicures. Invest in the time and effort to keep your paws in perfect form for caressing her sensitive spaces. When I say paws, I’m mean smooth operator hands, not clumsy bear paws. Keep them soft. Get rid of callouses, rough, dry or flaky skin. Hang nails can be torture and will stop her arousal, take her out of her body and straight into quiet resentment. Keep hands clean and that means under the nails too. Dirt doesn’t belong there so don’t transfer down there either.
And the most important (the one she really needs you to know) advice…
Tip 4: Fingers are for touching, not thrusting.
You already have boy bits that thrusts. Use your hands to excite and entice her in ways that your erection cannot. Your fingers are infinitely more capable of bringing her to crazy, sexy sensations heights. Indulge her. Use those skilled magician hands to caress, explore, embrace, tickle, stroke, massage and fondle your beloved. Use your hands to caress your beloved’s neck, cheeks, shoulders, and arms to increase your mutual desire.
Absolutely never, ever thrust your fingers in and out rapidly unless she absolutely, positively asks you to.
Your mantastic prowess will improve when you follow these guidelines and your partner’s cues. You will inspire hunger and desire for me when you take time to prime your hands for loving touch and listen to her murmurs for more or less of whatever you are doing.
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