You’re probably wondering what in the world is she talking about? Let me tell you. In the dating game, it’s never a good idea to sleep with a new guy on the first, or even the second date. It’s all about impressions, and in an effort to build a hopefully long lasting relationship, dropping your drawers before dinner’s even paid for is just trashy. All that guy is going to think of you after that is that for the price of a Golden Corral buffet, he got laid! You were worth all of $7.99 plus tax. Cocina!
I’m here to tell you a sure fire way to keep your critter locked away until you’ve racked up at least three Ruth Chris’s Steakhouse dinners (averaging $100 a piece). Would you say you’re worth at least $300 before slopping out the dessert cart? I should say so!
Here’s what you do. On dates’ one and two, make sure to wear only your most-outdated, largest, period-stained (because you know that’s the only time you wear these) panties! You will be too mortified for him to see you in anything less than a sexy thong to even consider turning your chia pet loose.
Wait till date number three before tempting fate with the racy lacies. Preserve your mystery with Granny’s secret and save Victoria’s for that moment when you’ve accumulated enough dates for him to be worth your womanly wonders.
Remember, the large panties were only cute in Brigit Jones’ Diary. In real life, they’re better than a cold shower when it comes to dousing the flames of desire.
Dating tip #2: Whatever you do, don’t poo
Don't have any sexy new thongs? Check out lingerie from Adam & Eve online.
Follow me on Twitter @ MicheleGSASexam
All articles by Michele Gwynn are under copyright and cannot be reposted in part or whole without written permission by the author. For permission, email megwynn@msn.com.
Comments
Good point, but don't we want to keep all possibilities open? Maybe something like "date panties" would allow us to have the best of both worlds. I saw a cute idea for this at datepanties.com. I know for my part, I only want to wear my "parachute panties" on heavy flow days. Besides, I feel more like myself when I wear something sexy.
$300 for three dates @ Ruth Chris? A guy is a fool to kick out that much cash for three dates in SA. Any sophisticated SA city slicker knows he can wine and dine a gal 3x for at least 1/2 that amount at Azuca Cocina happy hours and get his mack on in a more light hearted and festive environment that includes live salsa music every first Fri. If it takes him three dates at a stodgy pricey Euro American restaurant to get dessert served in something sexier than granny panties, his game is weak yo! The fact is unless he's AARP or AARP at heart he should've done his homework to make sure she's into thongs or boyshorts ;-)
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