It seemed rare 15 years ago, when I was 15, to not be "dating" someone. Dating at the age of 15 for me means and meant having your parents drop you off at your boo's house where you hang out under close supervision of your sig other's parents. Then you break up a few weeks later and experience Taylor Swiftian emotions. My kind of teenage crush involved secretly (even though everyone knew) pining for someone while going about my normal studies, musicals, plays, volleyball and family time, and eventually moving on with the help of Alanis Morissette and My So Called Life because only they knew the Nirvana-like angst I was feeling... them and Buffy the Vampire Slayer. Always Buffy the Vampire Slayer. In the realm of secretly crushing on people, the reality of courting can naively (and wonderfully) go unnoticed.
Here are advancements from the male sex that 15 year old girls should keep an eye out for, ignore or punch in the face:
- The guy at your job who follows you around in the backroom while you're doing inventory only to end up humping your leg with an empty paper towel roll. This is a version of being hit on or something.
- A gentleman coworker who comes into the back room with you (yes, this could happen more than once or twice), turns off the lights, politely corners you and asks if he can touch your lady lumps. (It isn't as creepy as it sounds...at least not until the manager walks in and assumes you are an active party in this sexy adventure.)
- A guy 15 years older than you asks you, while you are at work and he is the customer, to leave and smoke a bowl with him in his car. This is a version of courting.
- There is the guy who has hit on most of your friends, has a "deep" conversation with you, asks for a hug, and awkwardly places his open mouth on the nape of your neck thinking that it is a kiss. This happens while you wonder if this is a part of grieving or an emotional outpouring that you don't understand, and you can only be still until this foreign version of grieving ends.
- The customer who is cute and asks for a hug. It takes another person to help you out of your naivete to realize he just wanted to be close to your heart (chest).
This is why waiting to date until college makes sense, because these fun stories could have become longer and led to a boyfriend who is a hot mess or assault and battery.