Cults: Best advice to former cult members: Stay out of church
It may sound harsh, heretical, hypocritical and maybe satanic depending upon the form of abuse and teachings you’ve been subjected to, but if you have been victimized in a cult or spiritually abused by a religious leader then you need to stay out of church. Why? Because you must heal.
Really, you can heal without the continual teachings of others surrounding you.
It’s too easy to leave one abusive group or cult and innocently seek out the warmth, affection and support of another, only to find that you have traded one set of abusive teachings for another. Take the time to heal. Find a support group but one that will just offer simple love and affection without doing so in the guise of religion. Those who have been victimized by religious teachings, cults and false practices must learn to get in touch with their core being. You must learn to take the time to rest, heal and get back to your own thoughts.
There is simply no religious organization on the planet that will not bombard you with their teachings, their beliefs and their version of truth. You must protect your mind from becoming victimized again. There is nothing sinful or inherently evil about logic, reasoning and critical thinking. You will not be damned to hell because you turned off the television, stopped listening to everyone else and focused on your own thoughts and rebuilt your own belief system.
God is not in the business of making robots. He does not force people to believe things their core personality does not agree with for the sake of ‘submission’ and He is not against free will. There is a way that seems right to a man, but the end result is death. Those whose minds have been clouded by the pervasive teachings of false leaders must stop, and let their mind’s heal. Do not rush to join another group, or make the mistake of believing that if you are outside the church you are outside of God.
The greatest gift that God gave to man was freedom of choice. If you believe that God created Adam and Eve with free will then you must see that freedom was so important that it allowed for mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone follows the wrong voice at one time or another in their lives. But by instantly subjecting yourself to another situation increases the chance that you have not had enough time to rebuild your own identity.
Let yourself heal; get in touch with your inner personality, your core being. You are not evil, you are loved. You do not have to run from your personality by trying to become someone else. All you need to do is be yourself and build your relationship with God, and you do not need a guru, pastor, priest, reverend or anyone else to do that.
What about sin?
What about it! All have sinned and come short of the glory of God. If you believe that Jesus Christ paid the penalty for your sin then that is enough. Lean on your faith in God, in the shed blood of Jesus Christ and in the power of the Holy Spirit- but do NOT lean on the teachings, prayers, coverings, prophecies, dictates and rules by someone who tells you they are enlightened.
Jesus Christ has been in the business of forgiving sins for 2,000 years; He does not need your leader to accomplish the job.
The best thing that you can do for yourself is stay out of church and other group think organizations that will ultimately cause you more harm than good.
You will heal, but like any psychic (deeply emotional) wound it takes time. If you do not give yourself this time to just rest, be and come to grips with what you’ve been through- if you do not find your own path and learn to trust the still, small voice that speaks to your heart- you may find yourself facing chronic depression and other psychiatric illnesses that will not simply go away.
You can gain the victory and find wholeness, but it is you who will find it and it won’t come through someone cramming their beliefs at you. You must learn, no matter how long it takes, that you can trust your own belief system. It is only then, that you will find the peace needed to face this world and the problems it brings.
Comments
Interesting stuff though I would have to say that Jesus Christ is God's best gift and free will would be second. I am no student of human personality or psycology but I think if a church is loving and understands it ministry of healing, it would provide an atmosphere for the former cult member to heal more quickly. Just a random thought.
Ha Ha Ha. Now what was I saying about this just the other day?
The author is hesitant to admit that her own religion is also a cult by definition.
But walk your path, sweety. See where it goes.
Those who have embraced Christianity have not seen their spiritual scenary change in 2000 years. You stopped to worship a roadsign, got a little heady from the experience, and forgot to keep moving.
Sounds right where your Satan would want you...
x
i agree with the writer if a person is still vulnerable and sensitive about a bad expereince in a cult or such then any religion or following might cause futher damage. of course from this a person might become athiest , agnostic , theist, or even a deist. not to mention after this experience a person would want to think about what they really believe and to known to what religion they should belong to. by the way xexon ever hear of the, the protestants ? christianity out of any religons have had the biggest spirtiual changes
In my 20 years of the study of religions I have been blessed with one thing I believe... that is a personal experience with God. Though I have not always been a Christian minister, The one true God was always there, leading me to that one truth that would set me free.
I believe that one truth is not found in a building, or in the people. It is found from our personal experiences, one on one with God. We can not simply except anything for there are always wolves in sheep's clothing in all religions period. We must read and study for ourselves, comparing what we have learned and experienced with that of the teachings we are taught.
There is a truth of all things. It may take a lifetime and many sorrows, but if our will is sincere and true, I know in the end we will have found it. There is a God, and he loves his people.
Thank you for sharing that Richard, I agree with you 100%. Man will always fail but God never does. It's when man takes his eyes off God and puts his gaze on man that problems are bound to arise.
When you said, "We must read and study for ourselves, comparing what we have learned and experienced with that of the teachings we are taught," that is the heart of what I tried to get across in this article.
Cults and spiritually abusive churches (in all religions) convince their followers that they do not have the ability, means or even intelligence to study for themselves and to compare teachings with their experiences- to filter information through their own minds- and then decide for each own what they will believe.
The most dangerous teaching is that you cannot trust your own relationship, quest, experiences or search for God and that you need someone else to guide, assist and direct you in your path...
No earthly human should ever take this place...it's strange that so many cults are led by men who insist on being called "father" when this in itself is against Scriptures...
continued...
Picking up from before...
Matthew 23 makes it clear that Jesus was referring to following men (leaders) who believe they are "teachers of the law" but are hypocrites...
1Then Jesus said to the crowds and to his disciples: 2“The teachers of the law and the Pharisees sit in Moses’ seat. 3So you must obey them and do everything they tell you. But do not do what they do, for they do not practice what they preach.
4They tie up heavy loads and put them on men’s shoulders, but they themselves are not willing to lift a finger to move them.
5“Everything they do is done for men to see: They make their phylacteriesa wide and the tassels on their garments long; 6they love the place of honor at banquets and the most important seats in the synagogues;
7they love to be greeted in the marketplaces and to have men call them ‘Rabbi.’
8“But you are not to be called ‘Rabbi,’ for you have only one Master and you are all brothers.
9And do not call anyone on earth ‘father,’ for you have one Father, and he is in heaven.
10Nor are you to be called ‘teacher,’ for you have one Teacher, the Christ.
11The greatest among you will be your servant.
12For whoever exalts himself will be humbled, and whoever humbles himself will be exalted.
Jesus warned against putting teachers and leaders in the place of God...and explicitly stated "Do not call them father."
Got something to say?
Examiner.com is looking for writers, photographers, and videographers to join the fastest growing group of local insiders. If you are interested in growing your online rep apply to be an Examiner today!