Sexual health issues can be embarrassing and difficult to talk about, but discussing them openly with a partner, or with a qualified sex therapist, can be a good way to sort out these feelings and enjoy a healthy sex life. For example, a new reader, Kimberly, in Washington, D.C., writes:
“Sometimes I cry during sex. It’s so embarrassing. Is there something wrong with me?”
Kimberly, thanks for writing in. Let me start about by assuring you that there is nothing wrong with you. Having an emotional response during sex is actually quite normal. When you think about what’s going on in your body, you are having a physiological response triggered by chemicals that are being released into your body at the time of orgasm; and some of these can trigger that automatic response of crying.
Or you might feel overwhelmed and not even know why. Emotionally, there could be a lot going on, as well; you might be thinking about how much you love your partner, or how lucky you are to be with him, or perhaps you’re thinking, gee, I really don’t love him as much as I used too. Combine whatever is going on in your head with those strong chemicals being released into your body, and it’s no surprise that the water works start up. Now, if you think that your crying is related to negative emotions such as shame, fear, embarrassment, or even guilt, or if you feel bad about yourself when having sex, that could be an indication that something more serious is at play; in which case, I would highly recommend speaking to a therapist about it. She can help sort out your feelings and get to the root cause of your emotional response during sex. However, if they’re happy tears, then no worries.
Good luck, Kimberly.