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Cook your holiday turkey on your car's engine

Under-the-hood food?  Yum!
Simon & Schuster

If you're planning to do some long distance driving over the holidays, maybe over 220 miles, by the time you reach your destination, you can have a lovely 5-pound turkey breast cooked and ready to eat. How?

Cooking a scrumptiously edible turkey breast under the hood of your car is absolutely doable, according to Manifold Destiny: The One! The Only! Guide to Cooking On Your Car Engine written by Chris Maynard and Bill Scheller.

For a palate-pleasing turkey breast, the authors suggest carefully finding a hot spot on your engine (it might be difficult). Tightly wrap your food item in tin foil, securely wedging the package into the engine hot spot, then taking off.

The cult classic was written in 1989 when vehicle manifolds were less insulated but reportedly, car-engine gastronomy is still en vogue for more folks than you can imagine. The book has been revised to include under-the-hood recipes that can be prepared in newer vehicles such as veal in an Impreza in 30 to 50 miles, a stuffed whole fish in a Pontiac in about 140 miles, or cooking a ham steak in an Escalade in approximately 50 miles.

If you're still a nonbeliever and feel your leg is being pulled right about now, check out the book, then consider trying the recipe below. The authors of the book do state that cooking times/miles will vary depending on vehicle type.

TO GRANDMOTHER'S HOUSE ROAD TURKEY

1 Boneless turkey breast, about five pounds, sliced into thin strips against the grain
3 large baking potatoes, peeled and diced
3 carrots, finely diced
Dry white wine
Flour for dredging
Butter for greasing foil
Salt and pepper to taste
Three-quarters cup heavy cream

1. At home, combine the turkey, potatoes and carrots into a bowl with the wine and cover. Marinate two hours in the refrigerator, then drain well (and don't drink the wine). Setting the vegetables aside, dredge the turkey pieces in flour, then heavily butter five large squares of foil. Arrange equal amounts of turkey and vegetables in each square, and season with salt and pepper as desired. Cup the foil around the turkey and vegetables, and pour over each serving as much heavy cream as you can without making a soupy mess, then seal carefully.

2. Cook on the engine about four hours, turning once. We're assuming grandmother doesn't live in the next town.

Happy holidays!

--Car Chick®

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