I can’t speak for men, but the vast majority of women are we want answers type of people. Ironically, sometimes no answer is the answer. A lot of people can’t cope with what could be perceived as a grim reality. A certain level of maturity is required to become an “it is what it is” type of person.
In relationships, regardless of what pain I may have experienced I have always been an “it is what it is” type of person. However, I can’t say this about my close friends and associates. If they feel as if they are slighted in a relationship quite frankly it may result in excessive drive bys, calling the City of Tallahassee to have their ex’s lights turned off, property damage, hacked email and Face book accounts, and even unauthorized access to voicemail. They really want the proof of knowing what went wrong. They want to be able to put their finger on every minute detail that led up to the final dissolution of the relationship.
Some people take my “it is what it is” type of attitude as passivity. However, my whole philosophy is that you never have to fight for what is yours and/or what is destiny. I apply my same philosophy in the work place. I’m simply a realist. Being a realist means always coming to grips with reality. As a realist you don’t really expect an explanation. You simply deal with what is right in front of your face and continue to press on.
I encourage all women to never turn into the sinister ex. Sometimes a woman’s ego allows causes her to say things like he is going to drag her through the mud just like he did me. My friend that simply isn’t always true. It is a cliché statement that people only do what they are allowed to do. You may say to yourself he isn’t going to find a woman as good as me. You may truly believe this, but reality is he may still find a great woman. A lot of women feel as if a man’s history and behavior with an ex has nothing at all to do with them. Being a realist is saying that the opportunity, time, and circumstances were not of such to have an ideal relationship with a particular individual.
Women (me included) are very emotional beings. However, I had to learn to get my emotions together. Sometimes you have to put your emotions aside to deal with reality. You can’t write a screen play in your head for someone you have only known for a quick minute. As I have stated in previous articles that a pick up line is similar to an elevator speech. It is essentially putting all the best information out there in an allocated amount of time to get a desired result. Time is the best way to come to grips with reality. Only time will reveal the true character of an individual.