The Catholic world was stunned this week with the announcement of the resignation of Pope Benedict XVI.
His Popeness made the announcement during a routine luncheon at the Vatican Wendy’s over a bacon double cheeseburger and a Frosty saying that many changes and questions requiring a deep relevance of faith have occurred and he proclaimed he no longer has the capacity to fulfill his ministry. He also explained to the secular gathering that he was sick of working holidays such as Christmas and Easter.
The announcement came at a particularly distressing time for me because I had already decided to give up pizza for Lent. I found myself agonizing over this because I love calzone and I wasn’t sure if a calzone was actually a folded up pizza or just a half-moon hunk of fried dough filled with pizza stuff.
I sought out my priest and asked for his guidance on the matter. He could not give me a concrete testament, but he assured me I would not be breaking any sacrilege. He went on to explain;
“With the recent interest in the Pope my son, many people want to know all about the Popes.
“They want to know their names, what their real names are, when they lived, when they died, all that stuff. It’s sort of a Papal mania sweeping the world.
“That’s why I’ve designed this poster to make it easier on all of God’s children.” He held up a poster in front of me of a large pepperoni pizza as he continued.
“I call it the ‘Find the Pope in the Pizza’ poster. All you need is a yellow highlighter pen and circle every Pope you see in the picture.
“Some are easy to spot, some are hard. And here is a clue to make it easier. Most of the Popes have red faces, and here’s another hint. One of them is on the right side of the picture, behind the desk.”
I was satisfied and after saying a few Holy Mary’s I went straight home for a tasty calzone to kick off the Lenten season.
Holy Calzone
3 Cups Ricotta Cheese
2 Eggs
½ Cup Parmesan Cheese
½ Cup Mozzarella Cheese, Grated
¼ cup Broccoli, Blanched
¼ cup Mushrooms, Sautéed
¼ cup Eggplant, Cubed and Sautéed
5-6 Scallions, Chopped
1 Tbs. Garlic Salt
Pizza Dough
Marinara Sauce
Combine all of the filling ingredients in a large bowl and mix well.
Divide pizza dough and roll out in to 8-inch circles. Equally place filling in center of each pizza round, don’t go crazy, you don’t want them to burst! Fold each pizza round over and crimp edges with a fork. Seal edges with water and brush each calzone with egg wash.
Do not crowd calzones when deep frying. Fry in batches for 5 minutes or so or until golden brown. Serve with a side of marinara sauce for dipping.
Ciao your Holiness and vai con Dio.
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