Are you counting the shopping days left until your carefully wrapped and beautifully bowed gifts are opened? If you live in the Northeast like I do, the shopping days have gotten longer — 24 hours longer to be exact — as Macy’s Herald Square, whole neighborhoods in Brooklyn, Toys R Us and of course the ubiquitous Walmart Superstores are open continuously until Christmas. It’s no wonder that many of us are questioning whether we’ve really shopped enough, and that many of our client sessions have likely focused on regrets about money spent or arguments about breaking budget. Relationships, finances, demands. These stresses are part of the season, but do they really need to be?
Some positive body cheer: Reverend Andrea Cornett-Scott of Mary Baldwin College in VA., is tired of watching young Black American girls devalue themselves, she has started a campaign to provide families with Black baby dolls this Christmas. In a conversation with her, Rev. Cornett-Scott related that the doll project “helps African American girls understand that being black and having brown skin, full lips and curly hair is something to cherish. In fact, just like the dolls we share with them are beautiful we are sending a clear message that they too are beautiful.” The project has distributed about 400 dolls in the past, and Cornett-Scott has collected about 250 so far, and thinks she will be able to reach that number this year.
So how can we return to the real meaning of the season, and encourage a relaxed holiday? Here are some tips:
1. Assess what’s really important for the holiday. Is it spending time with people we love, having a chance to step back and enjoy the peace of the winter, or something else? Make that a priority. Chances are what’s really important is not shopping to the point of exhaustion or spending beyond comfort levels.
2. Simplify. The demands of the season can be endless, and much of our stress comes from trying to juggle too many things. It’s ok to say “no.”
3. Healthy eating and exercise. The holidays present numerous opportunities to overindulge. Unfortunately many sugary foods zap energy, and leave us sluggish and out of sorts. It’s important to keep up with eating frequent, small meals. It also helps to focus on gentle exercise, such as walking or stretching, which also helps combat the blahs.
4. Be realistic. There’s no need to become Ward or June during the holidays (or anytime for that matter). Sometimes, unlike June, we overcook the turkey or can’t find the “perfect” gift. This is a time to set reasonable expectations.
5. “Me” time. Remember to take time to relax and recharge in whatever way feels good to you. During the holiday we often so focused on others that our own needs get set aside, a definite recipe for crabbiness. That said it’s also helpful to give back. Volunteering at a soup kitchen can provide the type of self-fulfillment that your local Target can’t.
Have a joyous and peaceful holiday!
Philadelphia area treatment programs:
Belmont Center
Brandywine Center
Renfrew Center
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