Choosing our Mindset

It is not a secret being a single parent is tough. Being the primary caregiver of children often brings many stressors. The mind constantly swirls thinking of all the stressors: money, making sure you are spending enough time with your children, balancing work and family life, helping your children strive academically, taking care of the house, making sure the children are fed, making sure socially and emotionally they are healthy, and if possible trying to find for yourself. Sometimes having all these stressors can make you become tired, edgy, and easily frustrated. These negative emotions can also eventually lead to anger, resentment, and bitterness.
While it is easy to become bitter, resentful and angry toward the absent parent, those feelings are only eating away at you. The other parent is not impacted by your negative emotions. These negative feelings are taking away your joy, happiness, and possibly even your motivation and drive. While it can be hard, do not give the other person that much control and power over your life and thought process.
According to the Humanistic perspective, we have free will and choice. We can choose to stay angry, bitter, and resentful or we can choose to realize the other parent is the one missing out on the joys of being involved with the children. The humanistic perspective also states we are responsible for our own happiness. We should let others rob us of this.
You have a choice, you can choose to sit back and realize, despite all the stressors of being a single parent, you have one of the most special gifts and that is the primary responsibility of your children. Think of all the memories you are forming with your children. The positive impact you are making in their lives. You are also showing them how important it is to be strong and dependable. These are important traits in life. Think also about the ways your children put a smile on your face every day. Or, you can choose the negative view. You can let your resentment, bitterness, and anger control your life. This will over time eat away at you slowly. Taking all your joy and eventually you may become more and more angry, bitter, and resentful. What type of life is this?
Remember, we cannot change anyone but ourselves. Choose today to have a positive mindset despite your current situation. The more positive our thoughts become, the more we can embrace and enjoy life. Also, the more positive we are, the happier we become.