Having a disability is often more involved than people realize. There is a lot more emotional issues, scheduling issues and learning how to manage care. It's not as easy as just get in a wheelchair or use a walker and life is good.
When you rely on others for care of yourself and living environment, things get complicated. Attendants often have a set way of working but need to realize that they are helping someone else and need to do what they ask or need even if you don't always agree.
Sometimes the person with the disability just accepts things even if they rather something be different. This happens in order to keep peace instead of having an angry attendant. But the attendant has to know that they are working to make you more independent and not just your way or the highway.
Try to keep communication open. It's hard to be a boss but you need to or you will be unhappy with life. In the end, that will just stress you out even more. If they continue not to listen, then it might be time to move on.