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Celebrities Say The Darndest Things

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I was recently invited by SpicyPluck (www.spicypluck.com), to compile this year's best quotes from our fave TV & Film celebs. Below are excerpts of some of the ones I pulled which are meant to either make you laugh, shock you or inspire you.

"She can't dance. Her body looked like hell, the song wasn't great, one cheek was hanging out & girl if your tongue is coated, don't stick your tongue out. ~Cher referring to Miley Cyrus

"I don't really know what the big deal is. I didn't know if they thought Miley was going to sit down and play piano like Alicia Keys? That song is about taking Molly." ~Paula Patton

"@Bethenny: I don't care if Ryan Gosling & George Clooney show up at my door tonight, I'm going to bed at 8:30." ~Bethenny Frankel

"I felt a lot of responsibility for it ending, but then I found out the real truth, which I can't necessarily disclose because I keep it locked in my safe for a rainy day."~Katy Perry referring to Russell Brand

"I is what I is.If there is anyone out there that has never said something that they wish they could take back, please pick up that stone and throw it so hard that it kills me."~Paula Deen

"I investigated wine and spirits thoroughly, and they certainly investigated me as well, and we found out that we got along beautifully, but maybe too well." ~Johnny Depp

"I don't like Botox ...I think people look at tiny patches of their face and try to fix everything -- they've lost the plot!" ~Gwyneth Paltrow

"A lot of people I knew who didn't struggle, who maybe came from a lot of money or were really pretty—those people actually have a harder time as adults in a way." ~Zooey Deschanel

"Once you get over a certain hump there actually is less pressure. You can begin to look great for your age. You don't have to look young anymore." ~Michelle Pfeiffer

"Maybe this is my John Travolta Pulp Fiction moment.” ~ Ian Ziering referring to his performance on the Summer cult flick, airing on Fax, 'Sharknado'

"I don't have to play grab a** under the table on Easter Sunday." ~ Nick Lachey referring to his ex, Jessica Simpson's Dad, while chatting with Bravo's Andy Cohen

"We live in a country where it's always ‘Miller Time’ so what are you going to do? It's happy hour somewhere in the world.” ~Charlie Sheen

"Oh, I'd like to get married. Very bad. You got that wrong.What happened was, nobody ever asked me." ~Diane Keaton

"I'm just an indecisive guy. I'm lazy. Ask me again in 6 months." ~Larry David on whether or not there will be another season of 'Curb.'

"I'm not about to shut up" ~Leah Remini on Scientology

"We were going to name her Pearl Olive Owen, but then her initials would have been 'POO' so we went ahead and switched that around." ~Jake Owen

"It was more romantic this time than the first. Gregg and I are real adults, so it was better.” ~NeNe Leakes

"Because rich bitches want gifts too." ~NeNe Leakes

"What's Katie Couric? Is she a legitimate journalist? Is she getting tabloidy? Wasn't she on the Today show?" ~Jennifer Aniston

"Though I've seen Matt's ass quite a lot, it was nice to get an update.”~Ben Affleck referring to. Matt Damon in HBO's 'Behind The Candelabra'

"I can't tell you how many times in the 90's I'd meet somebody, we'd be having a nice time, and they'd go, " This is exactly like 'Before Sunrise." And I'd have to get up and leave." ~Ethan Hawke

"People who love to be in the spotlight often have a lot of skeletons in their closet. ~Bethenny Frankel

"She was on the Today show. She got a demotion to her own show." ~ Chelsea Handler referring to Katie Couric

"There is no amount of botox in the world that can hide bitterness. Keep a tender heart. You can be bitter or better. Be better." ~Kathie Lee Gifford

"Any actor who shows up at rehearsal without a pen to make notes in their script isn’t professional enough to either be in my movie or worthy enough to be trusted with one of my characters.' ~Quentin Tarrantino

"I would never even tell anyone I had drugs because I wanted them all to myself." ~Kelly Osbourne

"You realize that you've said written words more than you've actually had a chance to say your own words. You start thinking about that as a kind of insane option for a human being." ~Johnny Depp

"Dance like nobody's watching. It's good for the mind and body." ~Sharon Stone

“The only way the Anthony Weiner sexting scandal could get more ironic is if my uncle Dick Long (not a joke) became his running mate.” ~Justin Long

"Anyone out there is trying and losing hope, just hang in there. You’ll get there. You’ll end up with a family. It is the most worth it thing. I’m just so happy right now, I’m freaking out. Little girls especially unlock something in your heart." ~Jimmy Fallon.

"We were talking about different names. You over-think names, you don’t want a name that’s been done, but then you don’t want something so weird people are like, ‘What?!’ Fallon explained that Winnie was in part named after a lake he and his wife vacationed at and got engaged but, "Winnipesaukee’s a little long. Also she’s a ‘win’ for us.” He also reveals a secret crush may have played a part "Winnie from The Wonder Years is the coolest girl on TV ever." ~Jimmy Fallon revealing on the Today Show how he and his wife came up with their newborn baby girl's name, Winnie Rose.

"I think one of the most beautiful things about growing up is this self-acceptance that starts to happen. I mean we all have our own self-esteem issues. I have to work out Monday through Friday for almost two hours every day, and it's a nightmare. Sometimes I cry, like, "I can't do this anymore! I'm so sick of it!"~Gwyneth Paltrow

"You gotta hustle in this business. If you want to accomplish something in life you have to work really hard, no matter what position you're given!"~Joanna Krupa

"The truth is, I’m not getting up an hour earlier and walking on a treadmill. I have the greatest workout partner in the world. And you don’t need a gym membership for that kind of workout." ~Jason Sudeikas

"It was harder this time for me because I worked 25 years and I am Oprah and people see me as Oprah. So, to do a movie and people not see you as Oprah, that's hard." ~Oprah Winfrey

"I think it was just to find some peace and just have no choice but to just sit and be." ~Lindsay Lohan on jail

I'm proud to be a Dad. It's something I hadn't thought of before. Now that I know, I feel good about it." ~Simon Cowell

"I know I have a face like a model, but I'm actually just a goofy drama nerd underneath."~James Marsden

"Acting is one step below pimping."~Danny Bonaduce referring to what his Dad once told him

"The last thing I would want to happen to my daughter is some crazy drunk black guy in a leather shirt to come up and cut her off at an awards show." ~Kanye West

"I'm super drunk right now"~Anna Kendrick referring to not knowing she wasn't being served fake beer on set while filming 'Drinking Buddies'

"Now I have a husband and we will go the rest of my way together" ~ Tina Turner referring to the man she recently married at age 73!

"Shark Tank is the new age lemonade stand." ~Mark Cuban

"I am just a normal girl and a human being, and I haven’t been in this long enough to feel like this is my new normal." ~Jennifer Lawrence

"The biggest reason that made me pause was how the princes were going to feel about this." ~Naomi Watts

"They're called 'privates' for a reason. I'm wearing pants for f*%#^ sake. Lay off." ~John Hamm

"I am proud to be my parent's daughter but I don't want to forever be known as 'that rude thoughtless pig' or Alec Baldwin and Kim Basinger's kid.' I have passions and interests of my own that I want to give life to." ~Ireland Basinger Baldwin

"We used to kiss in the doghouse. We would just kiss each other and go 'I love you, I love you and hug." ~Cindy Olsen

"You're never too old to chase your dreams." ~Diana Nyad

"I always try to adhere to Do Unto Others as u would have them do unto u.
I feel like if everybody did, life would b much more pleasant. It takes strength to be gentle and kind." ~Chloe Sevigny

"I am honestly not looking for anything. I have never been so closed for business in that way." ~Bethenny Frankel

"I'm only sorry that it was in existence at the time she took the job, because I would have liked to throw her a parade down Fifth Avenue." ~Matt Lauer

"I don't know a guy who wasn't a dick to me." ~Kate Upton

"If I listened to all the bad reviews, I'd never see anything I was in." ~Brooke Shields

"There's nothing worse for your ego as an actor than heating, 'Cut! Fake! Now do it again!' ~Oprah Winfrey

"I remember I did a behind the scenes for Seinfeld And Jason Alexander says here's what you should do if you don'y know the look you should have, just have a look like somebody broke wind and you don't know who it was." ~Al Roker

"It was the best acting experience of my life. I don’t know how [the stage actors] did it eight times a week, really, without some kind of rehab after or halfway house.” ~Julia Roberts

"A wedding with Savannah? I think that's a fantastic idea. Not." ~Katie Couric

"These baby blues, they're my moneymaker." ~Anderson Cooper referring to his sunburned eyes while on assignment

"Sometimes you just gotta be your own hero and save your own little heart, because sometimes, the people you can't imagine living without, can actually live without you." ~Khloe Kardashian

"Nobody can be prepared for anything." ~Sandra Bullock

"My dating history is longer than my IMDB profile" ~Alyssa Milano

"Housewives shows are like a sports team ur all going to have ur favorite players but that doesn't mean you have to hate the rest of the team." ~Brandi Glanville

"I thought he was super cute and had a total crush on him, and we started dating, and he would come over, and we would make out, and then I would start to get depressed." ~Sara Gilbert

"Although your hair will be grateful, the shower cap look isn’t the sexiest, so maybe do it on a night when he’s not around.” ~Eva Mendez

"It also doesn’t hurt to have somebody who likes you when you don’t have great hair and makeup done." ~ Jennifer Garner

“Now, I budget. I have spent days skipping meals in order to make sure I have enough. To make sure my children, and my wife have enough.I am struggling to make each day meet the next without breaking down and curling up. I am unafraid to be afraid, and in that fear I gather strength.
I have a wife whom I love and who loves me (me!) and who lifts me up. Children who are the most delicious morsels of joy and peace and prosperity.” ~Justin Guarini

"Work was my life before . . . Now I have no reason to leave home."~Sandra Bullock referring to her son

What are your fave celebrity quotes?

For more celebrity quotes, check out www.spicypluck.com

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