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Casual relationships aren't what they used to be....

Casual or Complicated?
Casual or Complicated?
Photo credit: 
warren chao

By definition, 'casual relationship' is a bad descriptor. That is probably the starting point that gets couples into trouble. Relationships tend to lean toward formality and acquaintances tend to be the casual variety. He wants a romp in the hay - she wants a man who will stay, or vice versa. In fact, today's statistics actually reveal that more men are moving toward relationship while more women are keeping it casual.

Nevertheless, most people who are knocking knees at bars today and sex surfing online will tell you that titles don't matter - bedrooms do. That's of course if one makes it to the bedroom or bathroom or backseat. The goal is still the same and it is becoming significantly easier to accomplish that goal for better or for worse.

First, the single scene is no longer entirely single. With the growth of sites like Fling.com, the singles scene is making room for married people who wish they were single and act as if they are. The influx of these new guests to the single scene has increased the need for all parties involved to get naked faster. That is because married people don't have time to go on a second date before jumping in the sack. They are not interested in courting or being courted. They have a limited window and they are determined to make the most of it. This factor alone forces the true singles to keep up with the new competition. For some, they welcome the new alpha dogs to the pack, yet others view the married masqueraders as mine fields since it is hard to see their ringed fingers online.

The second reason that casual relationships are heating up is related to the first. It involves the flood of newly divorced (or lately married) strain of pleasure seeking singles. This group is used to having sex – even in bad marriages – whenever they wanted and often without protection. Marriage was a safe-sex zone for them and the store was theoretically open 24/7. Just because these spouses now wear an “ex” in front of their title, they are no less diminished in their drive for sex. Of course, most divorcees who come out of sexless marriages are worse than kids in a candy store. They see the world as their bedroom and they initially welcome the revolving door of parading partners.

Eventually, the casual beginnings of sexually promiscuity – whether legitimately single or single in their own mind – leads to an ending that is far from casual. Pregnancies and disease are of course on everyone’s mind, but more common is the heartache, obligation and guilt that can turn even the most casual event into a lifelong regret. Married people inherent a lie to cover up for the rest of their life and singles go to bed wondering if their hook-up will turn into a stalker or worse. Jobs get lost, friends get sacrificed and nighttime fears take up residence when the bad isn’t filled. As stated – casual relationships aren’t as casual as they used to be.
 

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, Atlanta Casual Relationships Examiner

John Patton holds a BA in Communication and is a graduate of the National Journalism Center in Washington DC. He is a writer, journalist and lover of words. He has written for multiple newspapers, magazines, radio and even congressmen and senators. He has a nose for news and an affinity for...

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