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Carefully consider with whom you share your marriage problems

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The ultimate goal of any married couple going through difficulties should be to resolve their problems and restore a loving relationship. It is natural when you are struggling or hurting to reach out to someone for advice and comfort, but choosing the wrong person can be hurtful if not disastrous.

Avoid talking to a close relative like a parent or a sibling. Though they have your best interests in mind, they will resent your spouse for having caused you pain long after you have resolved your marriage problems and will dislike him or her. It will also make your relative feel uneasy to be around your spouse. Maybe that's why mothers-in-law get such a bad rap. When you tell Mom how your spouse has done you wrong, she will empathize with you and distrust your spouse from now on.

Avoid going on a talk show. Okay, kind of funny to say this, but every day people go on the Jerry Springer Show and air their problems. Humiliating your spouse on national television will not endear him/her to you.

Don't talk to someone who is not a Christian, spiritually immature, or backsliding. They will have an opinion and give advice, but can it be trusted? Not all Christian counselors are of equal quality either. They can be prone to giving you bad advice.

You and your spouse should agree on someone you can both go to with your problems. You should pray about whom this person is. I also recommend reading the book Love Life for Every Married Couple by Dr. Ed Wheat before you share your problems with anyone.



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