Skip to main content
  1. Arts & Entertainment
  2. Celebrity

Can you 'stand' the re-brand of Coconut Grove?

See also

Some members of the Coconut Grove Business Improvement District want to re-title the village to give it a cache’ and attract more business.

And the new brand? ‘The Nearby Republic of Coconut Grove.’

How this will play out is yet to be seen, but the natives are restless. Let’s assume the position of a med-fly on the wall and listen in on the possible discussion.

“I’d like to call this meeting to order. First order of business is to craft our response to the movement by the majority of Floridians who want to legalize medical marijuana. When the smoke clears, we’ll take a vote. Someone open up a window, I’m not thinking straight.”

“Look, we have to call our village something else. The acoustic acts are gone, the local artists have been priced out and ‘quaint’ just doesn’t sell these days. We need a ‘hook’.”

“Let’s think about what Key West did with ‘Conch Republic’.

“Don’t they already call our city hall the ‘Banana Republic? What if we call ourselves the ‘Banana Republic of Coconut Grove?”

“We’d be sued by the clothing chain and besides, the politicians think it’s a slam on their good name.”

“We’re close by the bay and some shopping. What about ‘Close by Coconut Grove?”

“We want ‘outside’ money to come in, so why not appeal to drivers with ‘Steer by Coconut Grove’?”

“How about ‘Drive By’? Whoops, never mind”

‘The way we drive around here, it could be ‘Veer By’.”

“Businesses are losing customers, what about ‘Please Buy’?”

“Just tryin’ to get by’ Coconut Grove?”

“Those won’t work. How does ‘Close by Coconut Grove’ sound?”

“Wait a minute, we’re trying to sell a historic piece of Americana here, so why not ‘Bye bye miss American Pie Republic?”

“The term ‘nearby’ is catchy. It makes people think it’s not far away.”

“That’s never going to fly. Might as well be ‘Almost, but not quite’ Coconut Grove.”

“I’ve got it! We’re by Coconut Grove”

“No, that sounds like the start of a proclamation”

“Or what about appealing to non-smokers with ‘Close but no cigar Grove’

Coconut Grove is pretty and it’s close. What about “Pretty close’ to Coconut Grove?”

“I think we’re getting ‘close’ to the real issue here. Will someone please open that window?”

And that, ‘More or less’ might just be Coconut Grove!

Advertisement

Arts & Entertainment

  • Tori Spelling
    Tori Spelling candidly talks about her husband's cheating and her future
    Video
    Today's Buzz
  • Jazz Fest
    Music and cultural festivals sweep the nation this month, see where the fun is
    Camera
    Festivals Buzz
  • Monsters Inc
    Pixar challenges eagle-eyed viewers to hunt for Easter eggs in their films
    Join the Fun
  • KFC Double Down
    KFC is bringing back it's infamous Double Down chicken sandwich
    Pop Culture
  • Angelina Jolie
    Knives, jets and typewriters: What your favorite stars obsess over
    Camera
    Celebrity Buzz
  • Paul Walker
    Paul Walker's brothers will be standing in for him during filming of 'Fast 7'
    Video
    Today's Buzz

User login

Log in
Sign in with your email and password. Or reset your password.
Write for us
Interested in becoming an Examiner and sharing your experience and passion? We're always looking for quality writers. Find out more about Examiner.com and apply today!