By Steve Beseke, senior vice president, think2perform – http://think2perform.com.
The very anguished thoughts I keep hidden inside me from the emotional bullying I received throughout my school career surfaced again the last few weeks with the revelation that Richie Incognito has been bullying Miami Dolphins’ teammate Jonathan Martin.
Why should adults continue to do such juvenile acts? Well, for the same reasons kids do it to other kids…
➢ To assert power over an individual(s).
➢ Establish some type of control of a person emotionally or physically.
➢ Make the bully feel good to alleviate the insecurities he/she feels inside.
As I’ve mentioned in my talks and articles before, being bullied in school actually made me tougher in handling life’s future challenges. I heard Richie and other teammates say that this was the goal when emotional bullying Jonathan.
To this, I say #@%*&^. Anyone can have an excuse or reason for anything. But, in the end, bullying serves no rationale purpose except to impose sometimes unimaginable hurt on another person – whether you are 12, 28 or 97.
Yes, it made me tougher and able to dust myself off a bit better figuratively and literally. I, however, still have the excruciating “wounds” locked away inside me, I don’t think about it much these days, but once in awhile the door cracks open and I remember:
Kids telling me because of my Cerebral Palsy disability that I would not have any friends, to go back to the crippled school I came from in the 1960s, that I did not have any right to date a pretty “normal” girl, that I did not need to be taking advanced high school classes because my kind only does menial work any way…I can go on.:(
No one has the right to infringe on another person’s individual rights, his/her psyche and show disrespect for any individual’s being in any form.
Adult bullying just does not happen in the National Football League. Any profession, and really any company, has its share of those who bully and manipulate for their advantage. If only we could change their views before bullying-type behavior becomes engrained in actions for the rest of their lives.
You know what, there is: We, at Think2Perform, can make a difference for your kids. Taking the lead on this because of my previous bullying experiences in school, we have talked with many schools and had conversations with hundreds of kids on resilient strategies that can help them deal with any life challenge – including bullying.
So many kids and teachers have come up to us after our conversations to very humbly say our discussions offered them ways to overcome the hurt – and provide a light at the end of the tunnel. We want to help you provide that “bully-free” zone and can bring our expertise to your child’s, grandchild’s or neighbor’s kids’ school.
We offer a comprehensive anti-bullying curriculum and/or customized resiliency presentations worldwide to counteract the type of very hurtful bullying so many children are going through now.
Specifically, our first-hand, authentic expertise have helped so many kids see hope and overcome such extreme challenges. Contact me at firstname.lastname@example.org or call 651-341-9826 for more information.
In this way, the acts of the Richie Incognito’s of this world may be diminished, and we can show the type of respect any of us deserve no matter our age.
Also, think2perform – http://think2perform - provides management consulting training for more than 10 years with hundreds of businesses, non-profits, groups, sports teams, individuals and now educational institutions. Such training includes leadership excellence, behavioral advice, emotional intelligence and work/life resiliency