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Bizarre Bits: 3 retro dating games

Valentine's Day is close at hand. For those still unsure what to do tomorrow, these three games may help one score be it lady, or guy. At the very least, it may induce laughter and that’s the true goal of Bizarre Bits anyway. Read on nerdy bachelors and bachelorettes.

This is the box art for Sprung.
Ubisoft

The Bachelor: Who knew dating could be so boring? As either a guy or a girl, players will go through a series of mini games, unrelated to anything, in order to score a private session with the Bachelor/Bachelorette. From the graphics to the gameplay people are better off practicing kissing techniques with a dog. Just who was this game made for anyway? (Nintendo DS)

Sprung: All right well here’s something actually entertaining. Players can tackle the perspective from a male, or female in order to progress through the story. It’s themed on dialogue trees in order to build strong relationships and the choices range from smart, to hilarious (especially at the end of the accompanying video). With its surprisingly great animation and quirky sense of humor, Sprung seems like a game this show may go back to one day. And out of all the games on this list Sprung may actually help someone in a relationship. (Nintendo DS)

Chulip: From the mind behind the popular Harvest Moon series, there's this oddball dating sim. Or is it more of a kissing sim? Regardless players are thrust into the dingy Long Life Town where a young boy, the protagonist, and his father are moving in. Soon after the hero meets the girl of his dreams, literally, in real life. Unfortunately she refuses to speak with him since he’s new to town and poor. So the point of Chulip is to build up courage by kissing others through a series of side quests in order to kiss the girl. It's...the oddest thing since Katamari Damacy as far as PS2 games go. It'd actually be fun if the town and atmosphere weren’t so dull. (PS2)

For a video version of Bizarre Bits be sure to check out ReActionExaminer on YouTube.