Best and Worst Super Bowl 47 Commercials

To be honest, I haven’t truly enjoyed a Super Bowl in years.

When asked, I’ll probably mention that the Titans-Rams tilt back in 2000 was the best in recent memory. I used to believe that the Panthers-Patriots matchup in 2004 was thrilling but I had an opportunity to catch it again (in its entirety) on the NFL channel a few months ago and was amazed that the majority of the excitement and scoring came just prior to the end of both halves. The other 55 minutes or so were just mind numbingly boring. (In all fairness, this was also the one where Justin Timberlake exposed Janet Jackson’s nipple and catching it live was a joy to behold!)

So why do I keep watching? Occasionally I have an emotional investment (when the Pittsburgh Steelers are in it, for example) but when I don’t, I still feel compelled to tune in to what I know will most likely be a dull game. For the most part, last night’s game didn’t disappoint. But I had high hopes for the commercials!

But here’s what I learned from the ads shown during the course of Super Bowl XLVII: by just inserting a farmer, a Clydesdale or Kaley Cuoco into your commercial, you enhanced its charm and entertainment value tenfold.

Here’s a look at the 5 best and 5 worst commercials:

Best:

5) Coke’s Security Camera—Just because it was refreshing to see people doing positive things in the world for a change! And hey, Supertramp!

4) Toyota RAV4’s “Wish Granted”—It was entertaining and amusing and proves that Kaley Cuoco has a broad appeal (someone reboot I Dream of Jeannie for her!) far and above The Big Bang Theory.

3) Best Buy with Amy Poehler—Cannot say enough about how funny she is. Love her in Parks and Recreation and she makes comedy seem effortless.

2) Dodge Ram’s Farmer—Though it stretched on for a bit too long, the combination of Paul Harvey’s voice along with the striking images hearkened back to a simpler time in America. This had more impact than any other slickly produced ad except for…

1) Budweiser’s “Brotherhood”—Again, proving simpler is better. Whereas the Dodge ad relied upon a combination of words and images, this one only needed to tell a story in a visual way and was one of the best commercials in recent years. Anyone who loves animals had to have your heart melt at this one! The ad was made stronger by Fleetwood Mac's "Landslide" (two classic songs enhanced the best commercials this year).

Honorable mention: Tide’s Miracle Stain (which was clever and honors one of my all time favorites, Joe Montana)

Worst:

5) Budweiser Black Crown—So I want to buy this beer so I can hang out with pretty people? I’d rather stick to regular Bud and have a cool horse.

4) Kia Forte’s “Hotbots”—Kind of juvenile and lame. This is the best they could come up with?

3) Century 21—They had at least two ads and neither wanted to make me buy a house.

2) Pistachio’s “Crackin’ Gangnam Style”—I usually enjoy the pistachio commercials because they’re mildly entertaining but this song wore out its welcome a long time ago.

1) GoDaddy.com’s Bar Refaeli Kiss—This could have been kind of funny but the camera lingering on the kiss and going in for a close up ended up being creepy. I’m all for shock value and wasn’t in the least offended (it takes a lot to offend me) but this ended up going from just short of clever to completely disturbing in about 3 seconds.

Honorable mention: Two Broke Girls pole dancing—Who hasn’t entertained thoughts of Kat Dennings swinging around a pole? That said, I found it a tad unnerving that someone at CBS decided to equate waitressing with stripping. There’s nothing wrong with either profession (I used to wait tables as well as frequent strip clubs when I was but a younger lad) but it just seemed weird.

What are your thoughts?

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, Pittsburgh TV Examiner

Sean Farren, a graduate of Marquette University, is an avid TV viewer with knowledge of the medium that spans six decades. He is also an aspiring novelist.

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