Becoming whys

"If we have our own 'why' of life, we shall get along with almost any 'how.'"

~ Fredrich Nietzsche

Becoming "whys" — owning our raison d'être, or reason for being — is the core question many of us are grappling with now. Why am I here? What's my true purpose?

We were taught to put our attention on form rather than function. The popular childhood question, "What do you want to be when you grow up?" was reinforced by aptitude tests and guidance counselors who helped us select possible careers. We've identified with these labels ever since. So I'm hearing clients, colleagues and friends asking, Should I just do my art? Teach? Get a real estate license? Go into sales?

My suggestion is, allow form to emerge from focus. Begin by becoming your "whys": why are you here? What is your heart calling you to communicate? Once you know your essence Self, how you express it can take a variety of forms.

One client reported, "The most significant moment was when you asked me, 'What is your work?' The irony was tremendous for me ... Here I had been looking for a job for over two years, literally visiting newspapers all over the country, and your question totally stumped me. What was my work? The question came as a breath of fresh air in my already congested life."

Melissa told me her purpose is, "to stand for peace." But she's not an activist, organizing marches or chaining herself to fences to protest nuclear power. While these are certainly viable avenues for expressing one's truth, her path to peace takes the form of bringing new color and clarity to the magazine where she's a graphic designer, to the people whose lives she touches. By embodying peace, she stands for it every day in a quiet fullness.

And irony has transmuted to inspiration. Coworkers at her last two jobs have said the identical words to her: "You're a breath of fresh air." This is what Gandhi meant by, "My life is my message."

Suppose your whys are about the next generation: you feel inspired to assist children's spiritual development. Once you know this purpose in your soul, it might take the form of lobbying for changes in public education, writing a book, or becoming a teacher in an alternative educational system such as Waldorf or Montessori. You might decide to home- school your kids, start a neighborhood discussion group, give workshops for parents, or speak at new-thought churches such as the Center for Spiritual Living (Science of Mind) and Unity.

The possibilities are limitless. And it all begins with becoming — embracing and embodying — your whys. Becoming whys is the wisdom path.

For further information:

The following suggestions for becoming "whys" are adapted from the book, For the Land of the Lost: How to Get Ready for God, by Hinono:

1. Relax. Remember, you cannot search endlessly and find anything.
2. Stop. Stop doing. Stop running. Stop hurrying. Stop thinking you already know. Stop judging. Never stop taking the first suggestion with you … Relax.
3. Ask. Ask anything you want, but make sure it's about your own understanding and development. Don't answer your own question. Wait. The answer will come. Relax.
4. Listen. Don't listen with your ears. Listen with your whole being. If you get caught up in the world again, you will get uptight. Relax. You can listen while you work. You can listen while you sleep.
5. Be Neutral. You might think reaching God is your goal. But without neutrality you'll never make it.
6. Allow. Trying builds a wall between wanting and having. It is here in the relaxed space of allowing that you begin to let Spirit return to you what is yours.
7. Learn. You learn by opening. You learn by sacred trust and by balancing male and female within yourself, within your families, within your nations, within your cultures. You learn what love is, not what you thought about it but what it truly is.
8. Stand In It. From Spirit you have learned what love and truth are. Now stand in it. Be it. There can be no certainty until love and truth are joined.
9. Give It. You learned it. You're standing in it. Now give it. Become a healer. Become a teacher. Demonstrate your life. Share it by giving it away. Don't be afraid that you'll lose anything, or you'll teach fear. Take a chance. Put something at risk. Do what Spirit asks. And don't try to be the Source of love. Be humble. Be honest. Receive as it is given by Spirit. Give as you were given by Spirit. Do no more and no less.