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Ask Kenni: Can marriage survive infidelity

Dear Kenni,

Do you think that a marriage can survive after infidelity has occurred?

Sara G.,  Lithonia,GA


Sara G.,

That truly depends upon the two people involved in the marriage. If the 'cheater' is devoted to changing not only his or her behavior, but also their heart and give the marriage their all, you may be good to go.  On the other hand, the person that has been cheated on has to also determine whether or not this incidence or series of incidences is something he or she can work past and not linger upon.  We are all human and all subject to mistakes.  Marriage is a continuous learning process...You're learning your mate as well as learning about yourself and your own personal boundaries.  Just like life, your marriage is whatever you and your mate make it.  The best you can do is to be true to yourself and what is needed to ensure your happiness.  If you have decided to be devoted to working past this indiscretion, then you have to be true to that.  As hard as it may be, you can not continue to throw the occurrence in your mate's face every time you have an argument.  Yes, it will take time for you to get to a point where you are able to trust your mate again. But with time, patience, communication, and faith in a higher power, if both parties are truly devoted, your marriage can be repaired.


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