People like to believe that men and women can’t be just friends. I believe they can but it’s very rare. There is always the lingering conception of ‘I wonder’; I wonder what her hair feels like when she gets out of the shower. I wonder how soft his lips would feel if I fell on them. I wonder if I could ever talk to him again if I saw him naked. If you want to take that next step from friendship to fwb to possible relationship you need to know the signs. Chances are if you are perfectly content on your friendship and have no attraction to your friend whatsoever then you will miss the signs. But if you find yourself up all night thinking about the next time you get to hang out with your sexy bestie you may feel at ease that they are thinking about you too. I’ve come up with a few signals to look for that are secretly ‘I wonders’ from your friend.
I wonder what you look like first thing in the morning.
You start out with a group of friends jamming at Rams Head or stumbling around Fell’s Point then before you know it it’s just the two of you. Spending longer hours together or setting up dates later in the night is the sign that your friend wants to get a little more comfortable. If there is no hesitation when silence sets and eyelids begin to droop than a sleepover may be in hopes. Sleeping next to someone, especially someone that knows you well and you are fond of, is very emotionally stimulating. However, waking up with someone is sensually challenging. People are at their most raw and sometimes vulnerable in the AM. Someone willing to endure the surprise is most definitely interested.
I wonder if you’ll still be amazing 20 years from now.
If you’ve been answering questions about your family or your hometown then you’re friend is interested not only in who you are now but who you will become later. If you’re friend just happens to get invited to Easter or Passover dinner then their sneaky little tail is trying to find out if you’re good staying material. Meaning your friend is thinking about staying around you for a long time and they are getting a glance at what to expect. Although it’s annoying when your friend tells you that your mother is a certain sexy acronym, it’s an acknowledgement of the family’s fantastic makeup. And who wouldn’t want to enter a family that’s fun and sexy?
I wonder why you don’t see how madly in love I am.
Ok so you spend hours and hours with your friend. You’re hanging out exclusively with them and they are begging for more. The two of you haven’t talked to your other friends in a few days, or even weeks. Becoming deeply invested in someone else’s life is admiring. Receiving this type of special attention as well as even receiving unexpected gifts and favors is a clear sign that this friendship or fwb situation is in hopes to something more. Don’t ignore this next step. Talk about it with your friend if you’ve noticed that the intensity has increased. Sometimes when you’re not looking for a connection one will happen automatically.
If you have your own dating question drop me a line. No situation should be tackled alone. Send concerns here!