Social interaction is one of the traits of a healthy relationship. The ability to communicate well, giving and accepting feedback, is the key to getting to know someone at a deep level. But what if you’re seeing more of a defeatist’s attitude than optimism? Could you be dating a consummate victim?
A Victim’s Mentality
People who play the role of victim are not antisocial, but their interaction with others is self serving. They look for situations in which they become the center of attention and for someone to rescue them from their misery. Everything out of their mouth is whiney and in every situation they encounter there is someone who doesn’t like them – they just know it.
Looking for a Scapegoat
The consummate victim has low self esteem and a lack of confidence and struggles with feelings of inadequacy. You’ll know that you’re dating one when they begin playing the blame game. They see every situation as needing a scapegoat – either by blaming others or taking the blame on themselves. What a downer to be around someone who is constantly pointing out that, "I guess it's my fault again".
Manipulation & Deception
People who live their life as a victim may bully in an attempt to get their way. Sob stories about a neglected childhood or abusive relationships will be the shield used to avoid exposing their true nature and being accountable for their actions.
Is there Hope?
People who have an attitude of victimization may not recognize their own bad behavior. If they do, they will try to justify it and are convinced that their situation is hopeless. But not all is lost if you find that you’re dating the consummate victim. If you understand and accept that it will take patience and effort to work through the issues, your relationship can blossom into a stable, life-long commitment.
* More Info: Whether you're experienced with online dating-- or new to the internet singles scene, find everything you need to choose the best online dating services at DateShowcase.com. Follow me on Twitter or you can get notice of new articles on the home page at this site by subscribing by entering your email address. You are also invited to read my relationship blog, LoveIndoors.com.