By Rosalind Sedacca, CCT
One of the most difficult parts of being single is coping with the holidays. Valentine’s Day can be one of the most difficult to get through, especially when those around you are busy with their own romantic celebrations.
Among the greatest challenges for singles, especially the newly single, is avoiding self-pity. Overwhelmed by a sense of isolation, or feeling undervalued as a person, can often result in making poor choices that compound your feeling of aloneness, emptiness or low self-esteem.
Turning toward a support group of friends can be really helpful when these feelings arise. Seeking out a counselor or relationship coach can also be wise. These experienced professionals will provide advice and open the door to new resources for creating alternative options for getting through this Valentine’s Day.
When you love yourself you’re not likely to face life as a victim. Self-love gives you the inner strength to overcome fears, anxiety and other insecurities that plague many singles. You believe in yourself, your value and the future awaiting you. You’re empowered to take action, make new friends, and attract healthy new relationships in your life.
There’s a big difference between being alone and being lonely. Loneliness is a state of mind that can occur even in the midst of a large family gathering. If you’re afraid of being alone or experiencing the emptiness of feeling lonely, get professional support to help you understand your fears and redirect them to a state of greater self-confidence.
With the right mind-set, we can discover many pluses in being alone. Enjoying your own company is a great feeling when you don’t “need” to be with others to make you happy. Indulge yourself in books, films, nature, music, aromas and other things that make you feel good inside and out. Making time for YOU is a healthy way to express self-love.
If you choose to have company, remember there are hundreds of singles living in your community. Use the internet, social media networks, MeetUp groups, newspapers and other local resources to find out about Valentine’s Day events, parties, dinners or other activities specifically for singles.
Don’t hide your head in the sand. Get out, volunteer at community organizations and you’ll find new friends and ways to enjoy yourself without a partner. Remember, you’re not alone. Many others out there will be happy to meet you, and enjoy spending time with you on Valentine’s Day and throughout the year ahead!
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Rosalind Sedacca, CCT is a Dating & Relationship Coach, co-creator of the DatingRescue eCourse for women, Mastering the Challenges of Dating: A Success Formula for Men and co-author of 99 Things Women Wish They Knew Before Dating At 40, 50 & Yes, 60! Her programs are available at www.womendatingafter40.com, www.womendatingrescue.com and www.mensdatingformula.com.