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Aggressive flirting: Why it may not work for you

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For many singles the holiday season is a reminder that they are deep in a battle they don’t seem to be able to win… loneliness. They get the reminder at family gatherings, where everyone is coupled up but them. They get the reminder at stores advertising romantic gifts like engagement rings. Then there is New Years Eve – the night no one wants to spend alone. Because after all, everyone spends New Years Eve with the one person they want to spend the following year with. Right?

If you’ve decided to venture out to holiday gatherings in hopes of making new friends you may want to be careful that your attempt to be open and friendly does not come across as aggressive behavior.

During CAVE BEAT street interviews, men were asked how they really felt about aggressive women. They were also asked to describe what they would consider aggressive behavior.

Initially most of the men agreed that they would enjoy being approached by aggressive women. But as they were questioned further, many changed their answer to only if they found the woman attractive. Others changed their minds after thinking it over and decided they weren’t attracted to aggressive behavior after all. ‘Unfortunately women who are aggressive are targeted by men who want to take advantage of them’, said one interviewed man.

So… how should a woman navigate the singles jungle?

1. Just be friendly. It’s OK to introduce yourself and strike up a conversation. But you might consider keeping it just a friendly conversation, especially since you don’t yet know him enough to know if you will even like him enough to date him.
2. Don’t be seduced by the ‘dark side’. Unfortunately for some women, a guy with the appearance of serious money is enough to take them into fairytale mode. They envision a rich handsome prince and all of a sudden this man receives perks and gets away with bad behavior that no regular guy could ever get away with.
3. Mystery is your friend. Yes, men like to hunt. This is not a suggestion that you play games. It is a suggestion that you be willing to take it slow and allow him to court you.
So while you’re out having fun, follow these words of wisdom, ‘Go slow and be sure’.



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