If you have been keeping up on the war on health care in the media, you may be as confused as I am. I haven't taken the time in the last few weeks to write, only because I have been seriously applying myself to my studies. I am working on passing the New York State Health and Life Insurance Licencing Exam. Learning about the laws with health and life insurance has been very educational. My experience so far since living in Monroe County has only increased my Anxiety Disorder. I have become obsessed with a desire to become well enough to be self sufficient. Honestly the cost of wellness is extremely complex these days. The price of health and wellness is not only money, but an extensive amount of time to comparison shop.
I was advised by a very good doctor, who shall remain nameless for his own protection, "Be aware of the information received in regards to healing. There are those in the medical profession who prefer you continue to be sick."
Although a person is diagnosed with a mental illness or disability, being a functional part of society is still possible. I see so many disabled people who are brainwashed into believing they are disabled by the illness or handicap, instead of believing in the abilities of the disability or handicap. An example of my statement:
- I can't use crutches or a wheel chair, without pinching my fingers or tripping myself to the ground. Although I am grateful for that, I am also amazed as well as intimidated by the talents of the people who qualify to participate in Special Olympics.
I am aware that as of today, I am not ready or able to go to an interview or apply for a traditional job. My goodness, I don't even have the stability or calmness necessary to stand and bag groceries for extra cash. The current status of my recovery has caused a combination of symptoms of Agoraphobia and Anxiety that keeps me up most nights worried about my future; and afraid to leave my apartment for fear that something is going to happen to cause me to have to spend money I am not able to make!!!....... PTSD, the brain never stops.
I live a daily vicious cycle. I do my best to cope with my PTSD on a "one day at a time" basis. Daily I attempt to stay focused on moving forward. I do my best not to be anxious of the fact that I am almost 50 years old and now see time as my enemy.
I have been told in order to deal with my symptoms, I can take Ambien to sleep at night and a daily dose of Prozac with an occasional Lorazepam to help me with the Anxiety and Panic Attacks. Okay so what dosage of that mix will allow me to function safely enough to be able to hold down a job? I have been on a waiting list to see a psychiatrist since November of 2012. When I was hospitalized, I was so medicated I couldn't drive my car. Oh, and natural healing techniques cost money that insurance does pay for.
The world was very foggy to my recollection. My ability to think and control my stress levels are still in need of therapy, yes. However, the drugs are not helping my ability to be self sufficient in a 40 hour week dealing with angry co-workers and bosses. To attend a NAMI support meeting is frightening to me. I have learned by self evaluation my triggers and what happens to me physically when I begin to experience a stressful situation.
My brain will not function correctly right now because I obviously still need treatment for any level of recovery. This information has been confirmed to me through the ACCES-VR evaluations I have completed since, after the holidays this past year.
In addition to good nutrition when it comes to a persons wellness, having good insurance is equally necessary. As you can see by the video I am sharing in this article; health care and our government are both playing tug-a war with Americans as the rope.