You can never lose--and no one can ever steal--the time and money you invest in yourself
The one person who most blocks you from a full, happy, and successful life is you. He is therefore wise who makes himself an asset. We can be our own worst enemy or best friend. We can be a source of trouble or a cure for trouble. So if you feel empty, as many do, start by getting free from yourself as a first stop to vibrant living.--Norman Vincent Peale
It is easy to know when you are unhappy with your life or want to make a change. It is more difficult to know what to do and how to go about it. I’ve made a few big changes in my life. I have tried to live differently, change my outlook on life, even changed some aspects of my personality. I feel that I am getting closer and closer to the kind of person I want to be. I still have many flaws and make mistakes on a daily basis but i am growing and i am making progress as a whole. Some days i seem to retreat backwards more than i move forward, but in the big picture my progress is slowly and deliberately- forward.
First and most importantly you must be true to yourself. This is my most important step to changing your life in a positive way. After all, this is presumably why you are making the change in the first place. So if your change is right for you at this moment, go for it. You decisions should be based on all available facts available at the present time; you can always revisit your decision if the facts change in the future.
Something inside tells you whether or not you are being true to yourself - you can sense it. You can sense the difference between sincerity and falseness. Not being true to yourself means that you are faking it for some reason of convenience, and faking it, in time, eats away at your very being.
There is a difference in believing something, and believing in something. When you believe something without a doubt, you have investigated it thoroughly and are certain of it. When you believe in something, you are subtly and purposely distancing yourself from its truth, and the further you distance yourself from truth, any truth, the less you are true to yourself.
You might believe in another person, or believe in a cause, and completely surrender to it without considering whether or not you believe that person or cause. There is a difference. This difference is what separates truth from the fake
Being true to yourself involves tremendous courage. If you lack that courage, you fake it. You fake it when you fool yourself into believing in something simply because it makes you feel good, or makes you feel secure, or real, or it is familiar, when you stay in a situation simply because of these things you are not true to yourself.
Being true to yourself requires guts, guts to actually look closely at everything, because now you are no longer satisfied by fooling yourself. You've done that and it has boomeranged on you. The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results. This is equally true with our beliefs systems, we choose to put our faith in something or someone when it has repeatedly caused us pain, why should we expect anything different than what has proven itself it the past .It's now time to get on with life in a more mature and intelligent way, to be true to yourself for a change rather than being true to something that tells you what to think. Part of being true to yourself is finding the courage to stand up.
This is hard for a lot of people; initially it's like having a rug pulled out from under your feet. But once you become aware of your circumstances, then that first step toward being true to yourself becomes intuitive; it's the only thing left for you to do as you begin to awaken from the nightmare you have found yourself in. To start redefining and rediscovering the person you once were, the person lost so long ago.
Once you start becoming aware, once you begin being true to yourself, then the freedom you feel can only be described as utterly amazing; it brings about a heightened awareness and a new freedom. The false security that once was your life and drug you into a life that seemed non-existent, is now replaced by a piercing awareness and intelligence that carries you to ultimate freedom. Nothing can compare to this -
A lot of my problems in the past came because I was battling something that wasn’t right for me, because it was what I thought I should be doing. But we are not all cut out for the same role and we don’t all have to take the same path in life. If we did the path would become quite busy and quite boring. Individuality is what makes life interesting.
Being true to yourself also means gently ignoring those who try to pour cold water on your plan. Not every one is going to be happy with the fact that your beginning to take back control of your life. Especially the one to whom you have given the control to for so Often they are people close to you - but they are either jealous, afraid or simply don’t understand. If your plans involve becoming independent from someone close to you, recognize that they might see this as a negative change from their point of view!
You will need to be confident in your decision and be proactive. It sounds obvious, but you really can’t just sit there and wait for something to change – you have to make it happen. Sometimes it seems as if there is a mountain to climb, but if you do one small thing, that leads to another and all of a sudden you have some momentum and you can see the way forward. Be diligent and stand by your decision, don’t give in when pressured.
It’s also worth remembering that we all have bad moments. Don’t panic or think that you have failed if you have a setback. I have had many crises of confidence at various points along the way but they never lasted for very long. Often it was a conversation with someone I trusted that got me going again.
Confidence is also a tricky thing to pin down. It is partly self-belief and partly the ‘fake it till you make it’ approach. You need to believe deep down that you are capable of what you are undertaking, even if on the surface things don’t always go to plan. It is also true that if you display confidence about your plans, other people will have confidence in them as well, and that in turn gives you more confidence.
I won’t pretend that I embody these principles 24/7, but I always try find my way back to them. I have to for my survival.
It is an amazing experience to follow a path that seems right for you. Your mind just seems to take off and you become more relaxed and creative in the way you live and deal with the things life throws at you.
You can also find Michael Clark blogging daily at www.dailysignsofhope.com and on Facebook at http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?v=info&ref=profile&id=100000735647202